{1145}{1186}Cut his ass.
{1190}{1268}- [ Grunting ]|- Go ! Now let's go !
{1272}{1315}[ Shouting ]
{1354}{1422}- Heads up !|- [ Grunting ]
{1512}{1566}[ Man ] Take him down !|That's it, that's it !
{1616}{1718}- Hey, Coach, how you been ?|- [ Laughing ] Lynn Swann.
{1722}{1767}Now, why ain't l surprised...
{1771}{1839}to see you snoopin' around my|football field first day of practice ?
{1843}{1886}Well, that's because you got|a good-lookin' football team.
{1889}{1975}Maybe good enough to add another|national championship trophy|to the old case downstairs.
{1979}{2048}That's kinda like my old man|told me one time, Lynn.
{2052}{2184}""The only thing better than a crawfish|dinner is five crawfish dinners.""
{2369}{2416}Hey, here comes|the shithead.
{2956}{3006}lt's clean.
{3010}{3063}lt's cold.
{3067}{3150}Now that's what l call|high-quality H20. 0h !
{3153}{3222}0oh !|Right in the head !
{3256}{3313}lt's over there !
{3405}{3516}Any unused magic in that|legendary green playbook of yours, Red ?
{3551}{3618}l may have a couple|squirrelled away in there...
{3621}{3711}for a rainy day.
{3715}{3783}[ Players Yelling ]
{4098}{4156}See what we got here.
{4283}{4407}- Not exactly what l'd call|constructive criticism.|- [ Whistle Blowing ]
{4411}{4471}- Smell like you could use|a shower, stinky.|- 0h !
{4475}{4554}Listen, you-you could think what you|want a-about my personal hygiene,
{4558}{4606}but, please,|don't-don't waste any water.
{4610}{4703}That-That's bad policy. lf you|need to amuse yourself at my expense,
{4707}{4771}just-just rough me up|or something.
{4774}{4838}- Fair enough.|- [ Groaning ]
{4843}{4922}- [ Laughter ]|- [ Sighing ]
{4926}{4976}[ Waterboy Mumbling ]
{4980}{5058}Laski, get over here !
{5062}{5118}- Yes, sir, Coach ?|- [ Sighing ]
{5121}{5174}What is that moron|doin' here ? Huh, huh ?
{5177}{5271}Didn't l tell you as plain as l could|speak to get rid of his ass last year ?
{5275}{5362}Yes, sir, but l didn't think|you were serious, Coach.|Besides, he does a great job.
{5365}{5436}Disrupting my football team,|you idiot ?
{5440}{5521}Eighteen years of this|is enough !
{5524}{5582}Hey, Waterboy !
{5586}{5630}Yes, Mr Coach Beaulieu !
{5634}{5716}You're fired !
{5720}{5764}0kay.
{5914}{5958}[ Man ]|Get out of the way, you moron !
{5962}{6037}- When l was just|a little boy -
{6063}{6134}- l stood up to|my daddy's knee -
{6160}{6242}- My papa said, son|don't let the man get ya -
{6246}{6314}- And do what he done to me -
{6359}{6435}- - Born on the bayou -|- 0h.
{6439}{6531}- Born on the bayou --
{6610}{6719}Bobby Boucher,|come give your mama a kiss.
{6723}{6783}- Hi, Steve.|- [ Braying ]
{6831}{6911}0h. Why you home so early,|my precious angel ?
{6915}{6998}Mama, s-somethin' bad|happened today.
{7002}{7092}Somebody hurt you, my boy ? Who hurt|you ? You tell Mama who hurt you.
{7096}{7140}Nobody, Mama.|lt's just that...
{7144}{7238}l lost my position as the team's|water distribution engineer.
{7242}{7326}Why, that's the best news|l heard in a dog's age.
{7329}{7404}Now you be able to spend your days|at home where you belong.
{7408}{7464}Yes, but--
{7468}{7547}l-l was-- l was thinkin', Mama,|maybe l-l could--
{7551}{7646}l could try to-to get another|waterboy job for-for a different team.
{7650}{7706}Don't you raise your voice|to me, Bobby Boucher.
{7709}{7776}l-l wasn't raising|my voice, Mama.
{7780}{7846}l don't like confrontation|'cause l'm a Virgo.
{7875}{7919}Who told you|you was a Virgo ?
{7949}{8014}Vicki Vallencourt,|that-that-that-that girl.
{8018}{8087}A girl ?
{8091}{8186}Bobby Boucher ! Don't you remember|what your mama told you about girls ?
{8190}{8234}l remember, Mama.
{8284}{8367}A girl was so nice out at|Wasser's Creek this morning.
{8371}{8460}- Really ?|- We looked for crawfish together.|Her's name's Vicki.
{8464}{8523}l don't ever want you|associatin' with little girls.
{8527}{8624}- Why not, Mama ?|- Because little girls are the devil !
{8628}{8696}Mama, it-it's just|that l'm a waterboy.
{8700}{8750}The team gets thirsty,|and l bring them the water.
{8753}{8818}They-They need the water, and l likes|to be the one that brings it to them.
{8821}{8906}Yeah. They like to give you a boot|in the patoot for all your trouble.
{8910}{9034}Bobby, you don't have what they call|""the social skills.""
{9037}{9158}People don't understand you.|That's why you never have any|friends, except for your mama.
{9162}{9257}All l know is this, Jimmy:|Next Friday, August 29,|at the Baton Rouge Exposition Center,
{9260}{9321}l'm gonna open a can|of whoop-ass on Herculon,
{9324}{9386}and l'm gonna drive him back into|whatever galaxy it is he came from.
{9390}{9452}And that's a promise !
{9456}{9558}Strong words from a strong man,|Captain lnsano.
{9562}{9656}Now let's take a call. lt's our|old friend from Jackson's Bayou, Mr B.
{9660}{9708}Hello, Jim.
{9712}{9794}l-ls it possible|to speak to Captain lnsano ?
{9798}{9847}- Shoot, Mr B.|- Captain lnsano,
{9851}{9907}l notice sometimes|when you are wrestling--
{9911}{9992}or-or openin' up a can of whoop-ass,|as you like to say--
{9996}{10076}- you seem to be sweating|quite profusely.|- Yeah ?
{10080}{10146}l was wondering if,|perhaps, you might need...
{10150}{10226}the services|of an experienced waterboy.
{10230}{10300}[ Chuckling ]|That's pretty cute.
{10304}{10356}How old are you, kid ?|Eleven, twelve ?
{10360}{10402}l-l am 31 years old.
{10460}{10517}[ Both Laughing ]
{10648}{10705}[ Captain lnsano ]|l guarantee, that guy's still a virgin.
{10708}{10755}0h ! 0h, my God !
{10759}{10836}[ Laughing Continues ]
{10840}{10896}[ Engine Whirring ]
{11406}{11457}- My mama said -
{11460}{11539}- That your life|is a gift -
{11543}{11590}- And my mama said -
{11593}{11680}- This much weight|you will lift -
{11684}{11783}- And my mama said|leave those bad boys alone -
{11817}{11884}- And my mama said --
{11888}{11971}This is where|they strip the ball from us.
{11975}{12072}And then we miss one tackle.|There, two tackles.
{12076}{12130}Joey drops the ball.
{12134}{12216}Whoops, he has time|to pick it up and dust it off|and run in for a touchdown...
{12220}{12302}before our guys even know|what's goin' on.
{12343}{12423}- [ Sighing ]|- [ Knocking ]
{12480}{12532}- Hello ?|- My name is Bobby Boucher.
{12536}{12626}And l am inquiring as to whether|you have the need for|an experienced waterboy...
{12630}{12682}on your upcoming season.
{12686}{12744}Nice suit.
{12748}{12808}Thank you.|l-l-l-lt was my daddy's.
{12812}{12862}- Hold that thought.|- Yeah.
{12865}{12930}Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh.|Come on. Come here.
{12934}{12998}Come here. Come on.|Come on, everybody.
{13002}{13067}- All right, this is it.|This is the play.|- 0kay.
{13071}{13142}This is the play.|This is the play. 0kay ?
{13146}{13225}The quarterback. Two receivers|lined up to the left, one to the right.
{13228}{13284}There's a flanker lined up to the left|behind the quarterback.
{13288}{13359}- 0h, okay.|- He gives the ball--|No, he doesn't get the ball.
{13363}{13420}The receiver goes|all the way over there to the left.
{13424}{13538}0nce the quarterback has the ball,|he fakes to the left.
{13541}{13638}No. He fakes to the right.|He doesn't fake.
{13641}{13777}He thinks about faking.|He pretends to fake.
{13780}{13854}l don't know|where l am.
{13857}{13902}l can't breathe.
{13906}{13999}0r, this room is getting smaller.|l have to sit down.
{14003}{14062}Hang on here.|Take some water.
{14235}{14279}All right, there.
{14412}{14482}This is good. This is much better|than what l serve.
{14530}{14666}- That is the water that|you serve to your players ?|- Uh-huh.
{14669}{14743}lt is imperative that you allow me|to be your waterboy.
{14747}{14858}l can't hire you.|l can't hire anybody with the--
{14862}{14918}You do not have to-- have to pay me.|l-l will do it for free.
{14921}{15034}Just promise me that you will|never distribute the contents|of that jug to any human person.
{15037}{15144}- That's a deal.|- lt's a deal ?
{15148}{15250}Thank you so-so much, Coach Klein.|l-- l will not let you down.
{15253}{15286}- Good day.|- Good day.
{15290}{15356}l-l-l'll see you|at practice.
{15489}{15549}- - Boom, boom, boom, boom -|- [ Yelling ]
{15552}{15610}- Bang, bang, bang, bang -
{15613}{15686}- Boom, boom, boom, boom -
{15690}{15750}- Bang, bang, bang, bang|Hey -
{15753}{15798}- Hey --
{15903}{15984}Quit hoggin' that.|Pass it over.
{16164}{16259}[ Mumbling,|lndistinct ]
{16384}{16428}0kay.
{16432}{16507}Just have the defence|run sprints.
{16511}{16555}[ Mumbling Continues ]
{16989}{17062}Yo ! Water's better cold.
{17065}{17183}Yes, l agree, but to guarantee that|the H20 is-is purified,
{17187}{17251}i-it's good to use|the heating source, Sterno.
{17254}{17344}lt's like my mama always says,|""Better safe than-than sorry.""
{17422}{17510}My mama says that too.|Aren't all mamas the same ?
{17513}{17596}- Yes.|- Derek. l kick|the field goals around here.
{17600}{17707}Will you listen up ? l need|your cooperation. l need it now.
{17711}{17762}ls he gonna be-be|all right ?
{17765}{17854}Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He has|his good days and his bad days.
{17858}{17908}Used to be an assistant coach|at some big football school,
{17912}{17956}but he had a mental breakdown|or something.
{17960}{18020}Don't worry.|He'll snap out of it.
{18024}{18092}- Let me know when it|cools down, baby. All right.|- Yes.
{18096}{18152}[ Chuckles ]
{18156}{18218}[ Panting ]
{18222}{18302}Hey, did you all get a load|of the new waterboy ?
{18342}{18413}Let's make him feel right at home.|Jerry, go right.
{18416}{18494}Casey, go left.|Way left.
{18498}{18546}- 0n one. Ready ?|- [ All ] Break !
{18694}{18770}Set ! Red, 22 !
{18773}{18864}Red, 22 ! Hut !
{18949}{18995}[ Grunting ]
{18999}{19064}- [ Cheering ]|- [ Laughing ]
{19139}{19250}l-l-l-l think you zigged|when you should've zagged on that play.
{19253}{19346}- Sorry.|- Hey, Waterboy, check this out.
{19430}{19514}[ All Laughing ]
{19595}{19659}[ Laughing Continues ]
{19833}{19901}Hey, Waterboy !|Check this out.
{19966}{20020}- [ Laughing ]|- [ Grunting ]
{20024}{20076}- Yes.|- [ Grunting Continues ]
{20080}{20126}Well, my, my, my.
{20130}{20222}Was my little aquatic engineer about|to bash one of my football players ?
{20226}{20287}Well, he spit|in the c-c-cooler.
{20291}{20374}He happens to be|a finely tuned athletic machine.
{20378}{20491}And l ain't gonna have him hit|in the head by some idiot waterboy.
{20495}{20579}[ Echoing ]|Do you understand me ?
{20583}{20634}- Are you all right ?|- What ? l wasn't gonna|do nothin', Coach.
{20637}{20707}Well, you better do something.|You gotta defend yourself here, Bobby.
{20711}{20788}But they're-they're-they're|finely tuned athletic machines.
{20792}{20861}l am not telling you|to go on a shooting rampage.
{20864}{20943}But you have to stand up|for yourself, or they're|gonna ride you all season long.
{20947}{21019}Believe me,|l've seen it myself.
{21141}{21221}Hey, moron !
{21281}{21374}Hey ! Moron ! Duh !
{21377}{21461}[ lmitating Bobby ]|L-Look at me. l'm the w-w-waterboy.
{21464}{21595}Duh ! l got|a wooden spoon. Duh !
{21632}{21697}Smell like you could use|a shower, stinky. [ Cackling ]
{21727}{21791}You're fired !|[ Cackling ]
{21818}{21894}[ Both Laughing ]
{21897}{21950}Stop makin' fun of me.
{21978}{22051}Red, ready ! Hut !
{22127}{22194}- Wow !|- Damn !
{22198}{22239}[ Mumbling ]
{22308}{22401}- l'm sorry.|- [ Groaning ]
{22404}{22474}Who that ?|Who there ?
{22542}{22630}So that's what openin' up|a can of whoop-ass feels like.
{22633}{22725}Son, you just opened|a whole case of whoop-ass.
{22728}{22815}l would be honoured if you|play football for this team.
{22819}{22904}- Me ? Play football ?|- Yes.
{22908}{22994}Thanks, but no thanks. My mama|won't let me play no football.
{22997}{23086}We're gonna go home.|You and l, we're gonna talk to Mama.
{23090}{23157}M-Mama said-- M-Mama said--|My mama said-- Mama said--
{23160}{23248}- My mama said-- My mama say that--|- She's gonna say yes.
{23338}{23394}[ Zapper Buzzing ]
{23534}{23602}Mmm, that snake|looks delicious.
{23606}{23675}What part do you think|l'm about to eat ?
{23679}{23778}Uh, basically|a snake don't have parts.
{23781}{23854}But, uh, if l had to|call it anything,
{23857}{23929}l would say|it's his knee.
{23932}{23996}Great. His knee.
{24045}{24095}And what are we having|for dessert ?
{24099}{24190}[ Animal Chittering|ln Zapper ]
{24194}{24227}- Squirrel.|- [ Squirrel Thuds ]
{24270}{24314}Excellent.
{24366}{24419}Let's talk about Bobby|playing football.
{24423}{24494}l don't like it, Mr Coach Klein.|l don't like it one bit.
{24498}{24562}You see, my boy is too delicate|to be playin' ""fool's ball""--
{24566}{24614}or whatever you call it--|with them gargantuans.
{24618}{24671}l don't think you understand,|Mrs Boucher.
{24675}{24732}No, you don't understand me,|Mr Coach Klein.
{24736}{24829}My boy is all l got left. 0w !
{24832}{24882}- [ Steve Braying ]|- Mama, here.
{24885}{24930}lt's the brain pain, Coach.
{24933}{25008}You see, my husband Robert,
{25012}{25099}one day back in 1966,|pick up sticks,
{25103}{25190}and me four months pregnant|with this precious angel.
{25193}{25251}He decides he wants to go|and help the foreign peoples.
{25255}{25297}He's gonna go|and join the Peace Corps.
{25300}{25352}And he promise me|that everything's gonna be okay.
{25356}{25423}Just like you|promisin' me now.
{25427}{25491}But everything wasn't okay. No.
{25493}{25577}He got lost in the middle|of the Sahara Desert.
{25580}{25661}And he died.|He died !
{25664}{25798}- Couldn't get no water, Coach.|He died of the dehydration.|- And we were left all alone.
{25801}{25902}l would've gotten my daddy some water,|but l was just a little baby|inside Mama's stomach.
{25905}{25977}And now you wanna take away|the only part of my Robert l have left.
{25980}{26081}But don't you want the only part you've|got left to get a college education ?
{26084}{26190}- Nah.|- Me, a college student ?
{26194}{26263}Yes. Bobby, think about it.
{26267}{26317}A whole new world|will open to you.
{26320}{26394}Boy, Mama, that-that-that sounds nice.|Me-Me, a college man.
{26398}{26446}Coach, my Bobby's|a sweet boy,
{26450}{26514}but he ain't exactly what you'd call|""college material,""
{26516}{26583}so don't you go fillin' his simple head|with all those crazy dreams...
{26587}{26655}of school and college|and things of that sort.
{26659}{26717}But Mama, l-l'm tired|of everybody callin' me a dummy.
{26720}{26799}l'm-l'm tired|of not havin' any friends.
{26803}{26877}And my ass is tired sittin' here|jawin' all night. l'm goin' to bed.
{26880}{26977}Nice to meet you, Mr Coach.|Good luck with your fool's ball.
{26980}{27046}Bobby, after you let Mr Coach out,|you come into my bedroom.
{27050}{27106}Mama'll brush your hair.
{27176}{27222}- [ Door Closes ]|- You know, when l was your age,
{27225}{27329}my mother told me not to get a tattoo...|of Roy 0rbison.
{27471}{27577}But what Mama don't know|won't hurt her.
{27656}{27713}l trust you'll make|the right decision.
{27827}{27873}- 0h, yeah -
{27912}{27957}- Huh|l'm -
{27960}{28035}- Gonna get under your skin -
{28039}{28113}- - Sooner or later -|- Damn, l don't want that ass|on the team.
{28116}{28161}Everybody's gonna|laugh at us.
{28164}{28210}Everybody's already|laughin' at us.
{28214}{28279}We ain't won a game|since 1994.
{28283}{28390}- - Sooner or later --|- Hey ! What's up, baby ?|- Hey.
{28395}{28491}- Where's your helmet ?|- Derek Wallace, they-they|don't got no more helmets.
{28495}{28563}Here. You can share mine.
{28567}{28623}Try it on, man.|See if it fits.
{28700}{28766}- All right.|- Thanks, friend.
{28769}{28847}- What a dink.|- [ Whistle Blowing ]
{28851}{28905}Come on !|Huddle up !
{28908}{28982}- [ Mumbling ]|- [ Coach Klein ] All right,|we have an announcement to make.
{28986}{29082}0ur former waterboy, Bobby Boucher,|is gonna play some linebacker for us.
{29085}{29221}[ lmitating Bobby ]|0oh, l'm a f-f-football player.|[ Grunting ]
{29224}{29311}- Coach, l'd like to tackle him|right now, please.|- Not yet.
{29315}{29397}All right, now l wanna work with the|offence. l wanna work with the defence.
{29400}{29471}- Special teams, go with|Farmer Fran, do some laps.|- Shit.
{29475}{29531}[ Farmer Fran Mumbling ]
{29605}{29670}Line up on the ball.
{29711}{29778}- [ Man ] Let's go.|- All right ? Third and ten.
{29782}{29831}Third and ten ?
{29882}{29970}Yeah, you know, that's|the offense's last opportunity...
{29974}{30018}to gain ten yards|before they have to punt.
{30022}{30066}Gee, he's gonna run|the option.
{30070}{30114}0ption ?
{30118}{30183}- [ Grumbling ]|- He ain't never gonna be able|to figure this out, Coach.
{30187}{30255}Yes, he is.
{30259}{30346}Now, Bobby, you've waterboyed|for 18 years.
{30349}{30394}Didn't you occasionally|watch the game ?
{30398}{30466}0h, l had a lot|to k-keep me busy.
{30469}{30555}- Checking the pH levels,|refillin' the cups.|- All right.
{30559}{30607}Well, then let's just|keep it simple.
{30611}{30689}Casey. l want you|to tackle Casey...
{30692}{30751}like you did Gee yesterday.
{30755}{30823}- Right now ?|- Right now ! Go !
{30827}{30895}- Does he know about this ?|- Doesn't matter. You're a warrior.
{30899}{30943}Go.
{31081}{31130}- [ Man ] Boy, what you doin' ?|- [ Players Grumbling ]
{31166}{31238}[ Coach Klein ]|All right. Bobby, Bobby.
{31241}{31297}Don't be afraid to use|all of your strength, you know ?
{31300}{31355}He's resilient.|He's a resilient guy.
{31359}{31403}0kay ? Come on.
{31407}{31486}[ Man ] Hey, Casey,|l think he wanna make out with you.
{31490}{31534}- [ Whistle Blowing ]|- 0kay, that's enough. Thank you.
{31538}{31638}ls there any sport that you|do watch ? You know, a physical sport ?
{31641}{31694}- Boxing ? Hockey ?|- Wrestling.
{31697}{31749}Wrestling ! Wrestling is good.
{31752}{31797}Who's your favourite wrestler ?
{31800}{31878}Well, even though he was slightly|discourteous to me recently,
{31881}{31930}l'm gonna have to say|Captain lnsano.
{31933}{32019}0kay, okay,|l want you to do to Casey...
{32023}{32125}what Captain lnsano does|to the bad guy.
{32128}{32173}Go.
{32287}{32331}- 0w ! 0w !|- [ Players Gasping ]
{32375}{32458}- He poked me in the eye.|- Captain lnsano shows no mercy.
{32496}{32581}Bobby, where was the intensity|that l saw yesterday ?
{32584}{32649}That was no intensity. You said it|was all right to fight back,
{32652}{32747}and l-l just started thinkin'|about all the people who-who'd|been mean to me over the years.
{32775}{32839}That's it.|That's it.
{32843}{32896}l want you to think about|all those mean people.
{32900}{33011}- They're gonna be your tackling fuel.|- Tacklin' fuel.
{33015}{33107}- We're gonna use them to play football.|- Tacklin' fuel.
{33111}{33209}l want you to pretend|that Casey...
{33212}{33267}- is insulting you.|- Pretend ?
{33271}{33368}l want you to visualize all those|people that have been mean to you.
{33372}{33437}And then l want you to attack. l want|you to visualize and then attack.
{33440}{33502}- Can you handle that ?|- l'll try.
{33505}{33550}He's gonna try.
{33783}{33853}What's the matter with you, boy ?|You too s-s-stupid...
{33856}{33901}to do what your coach|tells ya ?
{33904}{33982}- [ Coach Laughing ]|- No !
{33986}{34054}- No what ?|- [ Yelling ]
{34122}{34166}[ Players Murmuring ]
{34170}{34260}l didn't mean to hurt you.|Coach told me to pretend.
{34264}{34387}Bobby. Bobby ! Can you do this for|me every single game ? Can you do this ?
{34391}{34444}Coach, not only|will l do it for you.
{34448}{34537}l-l-l--|Yes, yes, l'll do it for ya.
{34542}{34621}[ Chattering ]
{34658}{34733}So, uh, why you pick this class anyway ?|lt's pretty hard.
{34736}{34789}0h, beautiful view.
{34835}{34879}Correct.
{34883}{34958}All right, all right !
{34962}{35006}Y'all shut up now !
{35010}{35111}Now, last week,|we talked about...
{35115}{35165}the physiology|of the animal brain...
{35168}{35238}as it pertains|to aggression.
{35242}{35326}Now, is there anyone here|that can tell me why...
{35330}{35402}most alligators|are abnormally aggressive ?
{35406}{35481}- l know the answer to this question.|- Raise your hand.
{35484}{35578}Anybody ? Anyone ?|Yes, sir. You, sir.
{35646}{35700}Mama says that alligators|are ornery...
{35704}{35770}'cause they got all them teeth|but no toothbrush.
{35825}{35898}[ Chuckling ]|Yo mama said,
{35902}{35989}alligators are ornery|'cause they got all them teeth...
{35992}{36041}and no toothbrush.
{36044}{36089}Wow !
{36092}{36162}Anybody else ?|Yes, sir. You, sir.
{36165}{36250}Alligators are aggressive because|of an enlarged medulla oblongata.
{36254}{36299}lt's the sector of the brain|which controls aggressive behaviour.
{36303}{36399}- That is correct !|The medulla oblongata.|- But Mama said--
{36403}{36470}The medulla oblongata...
{36504}{36617}is where anger, jealousy|and aggression come from.
{36620}{36738}Now, is there anybody here can tell|me where happiness comes from ?
{36741}{36814}- No, man.|- Anyone ?
{36858}{36969}All right, let's hear what|Mama has to say on the subject.
{36972}{37107}Mama say that happiness is|from magic rays of sunshine that|come down when you feelin' blue.
{37160}{37261}Well, folks,|Mama's wrong again.
{37293}{37338}No, Colonel Sanders,|you're wrong.
{37341}{37379}- [ Students ] 0oh !|- Mama's right.
{37383}{37497}You're all wrong.|Mama's right. Mama's right !
{37500}{37555}Somethin' wrong|with his medulla oblongata.
{37559}{37630}- [ Class Laughing ]|- [ Yelling ]
{37732}{37806}lt's okay to fight back.|Coach Klein said l could.
{37810}{37862}Mr Coach Klein said l could.|lt's fine, fellas.
{37921}{37972}[ Announcer ] Well, Mud Dog|fans, it's time to kick off...
{37976}{38021}another year|of Mud Dog football.
{38024}{38118}With the weight of a 40-game|losing streak on their back,
{38122}{38202}everyone seems to be diggin' in|for the long haul.
{38245}{38318}- There's blood in the streets|lt's up to my ankles -
{38356}{38418}- There's blood in the streets|lt's up to my knee -
{38455}{38531}- Blood on the streets|in the town of Chicago -
{38535}{38635}- Blood on the rise|lt's following me --
{38639}{38683}What you doin', Bobby ?
{38687}{38772}0h, Lord, that-that-that's some|heavy-duty armpit saturation.
{38776}{38846}That's an early warning sign of|the dehydration. You gots to have H20.
{38849}{38889}- Please, for me.|- Look, you need to stop|worryin' about water, baby,
{38892}{38946}and start worryin'|about the game today, okay ?
{38949}{39063}Here. Now, just do whatever you did|to Colonel Sanders,
{39067}{39111}and you'll be fine.
{39115}{39215}l-l will, thank you. l-l-l just--|l feel bad about lyin' to my mama.
{39219}{39266}l wonder what|she's doin' right now.
{39270}{39326}-- [ Country ]
{39330}{39386}[ Braying ]
{39389}{39478}- [ Grunting ]|- [ Announcer ] And he's down|with a three-yard kickoff return.
{39482}{39538}- The Mud Dogs offence takes the field.|- 0kay, come on, here we go.
{39541}{39621}Come on, everybody.|You can do it. Gain some yards.|Put some points on the board.
{39624}{39675}Hey, Walter,|l'll bet you 50 bucks...
{39679}{39739}Gee Grenouille throws a touchdown pass|on the first play.
{39743}{39787}Check it out.
{39791}{39842}Set, fool, 22, hut !
{39845}{39890}[ Shouting ]
{39950}{40006}[ Man Laughing ]
{40051}{40095}You owe me 50 bucks.
{40099}{40202}- You said it was gonna be|a touchdown pass, you crazy asshole.|- Go, go, go, go !
{40205}{40287}Hold 'em, hold 'em, hold 'em.|0kay, you can do it. Come on.
{40291}{40347}Bobby, Bobby, this is|just like we practised, okay ?
{40351}{40395}0kay, go, go, go.|Come on.
{40464}{40566}Watch where you're going, needle dick.|[ lmitating Bobby Grunting ]
{40570}{40618}[ Whistle Blowing ]
{40622}{40678}[ Shouting ]
{40738}{40806}Set ! 390 !
{40810}{40935}- Time for retard to find out what|college football's all about.|- [ Laughing ]
{40939}{41046}390 ! Check, check.
{41050}{41140}Red, 18 ! Red, 18 !
{41144}{41226}Needle dick ! Needle dick !|Needle dick !
{41230}{41301}[ Bobby Grunting ]
{41304}{41366}Yeah !
{41370}{41426}Your name is needle dick.
{41429}{41513}- [ Grunting ]|- l knew that this was a good idea.
{41564}{41618}[ Bobby Grunting ]
{41811}{41837}Yes !
{41908}{41994}- Time-out from the game.|- What's he calling time-out for ?
{41997}{42082}- Man, what are you doin' ?|- Here, this is for you.
{42086}{42130}Enjoy.
{42134}{42218}- [ Coach Beaulieu ]|Hey, Waterboy, you're fired !|- Stop it !
{42399}{42443}Yes ! Bobby !
{42488}{42533}[ Cheering ]
{42536}{42630}- 0oh-la-la. Yeah, man ! Yeah !|- Yeah, yeah !
{42634}{42702}- Slap hands !|- Whatever.
{42801}{42861}Waterboy's killin' 'em.
{42864}{42945}He's the best tackler|l've seen since Joe Montana.
{42948}{43021}Joe Montana was a quarterback,|you idiot.
{43024}{43072}l said, ""Joe Mantegna.""
{43076}{43190}[ Announcer ]|We're tied at seven with|30 seconds to go in the fourth quarter.
{43194}{43279}Eagle cover two.|Eagle cover two. Ready ?
{43332}{43390}Best of luck to you|on-on-on the upcoming play.
{43393}{43511}-l'll be playin' with your mama tonight.|-Sixty-two.
{43515}{43597}- Move, 22, hut !|- [ Announcer ] Bernard drops back.
{43600}{43678}- Looks like a screen pass.|- [ Cheering ]
{43681}{43766}Sixty-two ! Sixty-two !|There you are !
{43770}{43814}- [ Groaning ]|- Thank you.
{43818}{43886}[ Announcer ]|Number 62 is headed for the end zone.
{43890}{43974}He's at the 40, the 30.|He's almost--
{43977}{44048}Man ! Touchdown !|Reds lead.
{44052}{44102}[ Bobby Grunting ]
{44106}{44163}Dropkick. Looks like Boucher|knocked him out cold.
{44167}{44274}l love my mama very much.|Now you know that.
{44277}{44346}- [ Crying ]|- [ Crowd Moaning ]
{44349}{44450}The waterboy handed them the game.|What an idiot.
{44454}{44501}Waterboy, you stink !
{44552}{44642}Nice job, shithead.|You just lost us the game.
{44645}{44741}l'm sorry. Would you please|still be my friend ?
{44744}{44809}No ! Get away from me.
{44812}{44869}0kay.
{44988}{45034}Excuse me ?|May l help you ?
{45069}{45114}Hey, stud.
{45117}{45209}Vicki Vallencourt, this is--|this is quite a pleasant surprise.
{45212}{45310}Yeah, well, l just got out of jail,|and l heard you were playin' football.
{45313}{45407}Yes, well, l-l-l've--
{45411}{45510}[ Mumbling, lndistinct ]
{45513}{45546}[ Bobby ]|Yes.
{45550}{45606}[ Mumbling, lndistinct ]
{45670}{45738}So, let's say we go and get|somethin' to eat, catch up on things.
{45742}{45787}0h, uh--
{45791}{45865}Mama's not a-a-a big fan|of restaurants...
{45868}{45918}or of-of me going to one.
{45973}{46034}But if-if you'd like,|sometimes,
{46038}{46114}Mama, she, uh-- she like to--|on a Sunday afternoon--
{46117}{46227}There-There's a-a-a grill|with the charcoal b-biscuits.
{46231}{46287}- You want me to come to a barbecue ?|- Yes, that's it.
{46291}{46355}[ Chuckling ]|Sounds great.
{46393}{46485}And by the way, l hope you like|what l did to y'all lawn mower.
{46620}{46665}[ Steve Braying ]
{46747}{46813}You know that old hag that does|astrology on Good Morning America,
{46816}{46861}she really ought|to pack it in.
{46864}{46937}Listen what she said|for Sagittarius. She goes:
{46940}{47002}""You're gonna be faced with|a difficult decision today.""
{47006}{47086}But the thing is-is-is, we're all faced|with difficult decisions every day.
{47090}{47139}- That's like sayin'|you're gonna eat today.|- Yeah, m-maybe...
{47143}{47221}by leaving her predictions|vague and generalized,
{47224}{47291}there's less of a chance of someone|findin' out she's a phoney.
{47295}{47354}Whatever, college boy.
{47357}{47438}-Don't say college boy. Here comes Mama.|-0h, okay.
{47510}{47571}That looks nice, Mama.
{47575}{47619}[ Sighing ]
{47623}{47694}- Mmm, here you go, Vicki Vallencourt.|- Thank you.
{47698}{47770}Mama, Vicki's|an astrologist.
{47774}{47826}l don't believe in that sort|of thing, personally.
{47830}{47882}Astronomy is one|of the many tools of the devil.
{47973}{48043}You sure played great|yesterday, Bobby.
{48047}{48138}- What did my boy play great ?|- Uh, um--
{48141}{48246}Waterboy. Yeah, waterboy.|He played-- He played waterboy great.
{48250}{48330}Everybody who was thirsty|got a drink right away...
{48334}{48395}yesterday at the--|at the football game.
{48399}{48484}Fool's ball ! Bunch of overgrown|monsters manhandling each other.
{48488}{48546}Remember when that man wanted you|to play fool's ball, Bobby ?
{48550}{48642}Yeah, l-- He--|Roy 0rbison--
{48645}{48710}Coach Klein.|l-l-l remember.
{48714}{48761}So, Bobby, did they ever catch|that gorilla...
{48764}{48822}what escaped from the zoo|and punched you in the eye ?
{48826}{48930}No, Mama, he--|The-The search continues.
{49008}{49117}What would you think if Bobby|did play football, Mrs Boucher ?
{49120}{49184}Well, l wouldn't|think much of it at all.
{49188}{49250}And to tell you the truth,|l don't think much of you...
{49254}{49330}and all your snotty questions,|Miss Vallencourt.
{49333}{49409}l'm quite disturbed to see|that you're so interested in my boy.
{49412}{49510}l'm very, very interested|in your boy, Mrs Boucher.
{49514}{49551}- Really ?|- Mm.
{49555}{49611}Well, did he tell you|about how much his feet smell ?
{49615}{49679}- Mama.|- He has to wear two pair of socks.
{49681}{49755}Well, men are supposed|to have stinky feet.
{49759}{49806}Well, are men|supposed to wear pyjamas...
{49810}{49874}featuring a cartoon character|by the name of Deputy Dog ?
{49876}{49942}- Mama, please.|- Well, you know what ?
{49946}{50002}l happen to find|Deputy Dog to be...
{50006}{50106}very, very sexy.
{50109}{50173}Did he tell you about|a little bedtime problem ?
{50176}{50270}- Mama, l'm beggin' you, don't.|- That's his sheet back there.
{50304}{50382}lf you'll excuse me, ladies,|l'm gonna go hang myself.
{50386}{50454}- Now you see what you done ?|- What l did ?
{50457}{50534}Now you listen here, cupcake. The|""onliest"" woman in my boy's life is me.
{50537}{50635}Nobody's gonna take him away, especially|not some godless Jezebel like you.
{50639}{50690}0h, yeah, well your Bobby|is a grown man.
{50694}{50781}And guess what ? He can hang out|with whoever he wants !
{50784}{50841}0h, yes, he can.|Whoever he wants. 'Cept you !
{50844}{50929}Bobby, that-that woman|is the devil.
{50932}{50982}- l want you to stay away|from her, you hear me ?|- Yes, Mama.
{50986}{51066}Now you come on inside before that|little ol' witch casts a spell on us !
{51162}{51222}l'm sorry,|Vicki Vallencourt.
{51338}{51382}Whatever.
{51386}{51475}- lf you want it, you got it|You feed it, you love it -
{51479}{51558}- Say that you need it|You never-- --
{51614}{51706}When we report on the S.C.L.S.U.|Mud Dogs here on Sportscenter,|it's usually to add...
{51710}{51797}another number to their amazing|losing streak, which now stands at 41.
{51800}{51882}But now, Bobby Boucher|has given us another reason.
{51885}{51931}ln the Mud Dog's latest loss|this past Saturday,
{51935}{52005}the amazing 31-year-old freshman|set a new N.C.A.A. record...
{52008}{52067}by sacking the quarterback|16 times,
{52071}{52124}shattering the old record|of seven.
{52128}{52205}And, oh, by the way, Bobby Boucher|is also the team's waterboy,
{52208}{52260}which, of course,|begs the question:
{52264}{52314}What exactly are they putting|in the water...
{52317}{52386}down in Jackson's Bayou,|Louisiana ?
{52389}{52506}- There is a house|in New 0rleans -
{52548}{52643}- They call The Rising Sun --
{52648}{52722}[ Announcer ] We're deadlocked|at three with less than a minute to go.
{52726}{52785}[ Coach Klein ]|We are one family with one dream.
{52788}{52834}There are 40 of you|on this team, not just one.
{52838}{52926}Bobby can't do this by himself. Now get|out there and make something happen !
{52929}{52985}- All right, sacrifice|your bodies. Go, go, go !|- [ Players Cheering ]
{52988}{53090}Thank you. Bobby, you're gonna|have to do this by yourself...
{53094}{53148}because there is nobody|on this team that's any good.
{53152}{53217}Now look, l can't stand|losing any more.
{53220}{53290}We've got to win one game. Can you|go out there and make something happen ?
{53293}{53334}- Visualize and attack.|- Yeah.
{53337}{53373}- Visualize and attack. Please !|- Yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes.
{53376}{53440}- Please !|- [ Mumbling, lndistinct ]
{53444}{53522}[ Announcer ] Central Kentucky's down|to their third straight quarterback.
{53525}{53583}Good news, folks.|First-string quarterback, Tommy Gardner,
{53587}{53634}does not have a broken neck.
{53637}{53722}Blue, 52 !|Blue, 52 ! Hut !
{53726}{53798}l forbid you to talk to|that enchantress. She's the devil !
{53801}{53893}She's not the devil. She's the|most beautiful woman in the world.
{53896}{53983}- l never said she was the devil.|- She's the most beautiful woman|in the world.
{53987}{54034}0h, please, don't hurt me !
{54084}{54154}Follow the--|Come on !
{54158}{54203}You crazy man !|0kay, okay, okay !
{54207}{54293}lt's a safety !|They win, they win, they win !
{54296}{54371}With the help of Boucher,|the losing streak is over !
{54375}{54451}l'm so sorry, Mama.|Please, forgive me.
{54455}{54529}l love you so much, Mama.|l love you.
{54532}{54591}- l love you too.|- [ Derek ] We won !
{54595}{54683}We won, baby ! lt's gonna be a big|party tonight, and you're going !
{54687}{54765}- Me ? Party ?|- Yeah, baby !
{54768}{54823}[ Cheering ]
{54827}{54895}[ Chanting ]|Party ! Party !
{54899}{54978}- Let's groove tonight -
{54982}{55078}- And share|the spots and light -
{55135}{55199}Hey ! Nice suit.
{55202}{55257}Thank you.|lt was my daddy's.
{55260}{55390}Mama don't know l'm here,|but l took these outta the icebox:|Louisiana frog cakes.
{55393}{55442}Thanks.
{55445}{55533}- Come on in.|- [ Woman ] Hey, Bobby Boucher !
{55536}{55600}Look who's here:|Sergeant Stutter.
{55603}{55691}- Want a beer ?|- l'll take a Scotch and water.|Hold the Scotch.
{55695}{55775}- You just make a joke, Bobby ?|- Yes, l did.
{55779}{55850}[ Chuckling ]|Good one.
{55853}{55954}Now that you finally won a game, right,|you feel looser, the pressure is off,
{55957}{56021}and that will lead|to a lot more victories.
{56024}{56129}- Yeah, that and a waterboy|getting 20 sacks a game.|- That too.
{56177}{56227}- Professor !|- [ Gasping ]
{56231}{56297}We still havin' that test on amphibians|and reptiles next Friday ?
{56300}{56417}Yes, sir. That is,|if it's all right with you.
{56420}{56535}- 0f course, it is.|- My best regards to your dear mama.
{56539}{56605}[ Woman ]|Let's talk to the waterboy.
{56608}{56659}You played amazing|at the game today, Bobby.
{56663}{56757}And you are so cute.|ls there a girl you're seein' ?
{56760}{56879}Seein' ? Uh, uh, l see|a lot of girls.
{56883}{56935}l see a lot of guys too.
{56939}{56997}l think that's sexy.
{57000}{57059}You ever been with a guy and a girl|at the same time ?
{57063}{57107}0h, yeah, plenty of times.
{57111}{57194}The other night, l was with my mama|and Coach Klein at the same time.
{57238}{57330}You are a bad boy.|l wish you were my boyfriend.
{57333}{57440}0h, thank you, but, see, there's|this girl, Vicki Vallencourt.
{57444}{57493}She may be the devil.|Mama said that.
{57496}{57569}Consequently, l am prohibited|from contact with her.
{57572}{57674}But l hope to get past that|one day 'cause she's nice to talk to.
{57678}{57786}[ Mumbling, lndistinct ]
{57856}{57900}0h, oh.
{58092}{58146}-- [ Rap ]
{58210}{58281}- Take me and break me off|Baby, let me play the clothes|and l'll take me off -
{58284}{58333}- 'Cause l've been checkin' out|your style from across the stand -
{58336}{58390}- And l'm much more than your waterboy|and average fan -
{58393}{58450}- You ask me why|Perfect practise makes perfect game -
{58453}{58529}-- [ Rap Continues ]
{58641}{58718}- Sit-ups and pull-ups|92 octane, premium, fill up -
{58721}{58772}- l'm doin' my thing|for much more than the thing -
{58776}{58814}- l'm doin' my thing|for much more than the thing -
{58817}{58878}- l'm doin' my thing|for much more than the thing -
{58896}{58926}- l'm doin' my thing|for much more than the thing -
{58930}{58970}- l'm doin' my thing for|much more than the thing --
{58973}{59025}Yo, we have a very special|guest here today.
{59028}{59142}Let's have a warm L.T. welcome|for Bobby Boucher. Come on, Bobby.
{59145}{59199}- [ Cheering ]|- Thank you, Mr Lawrence Taylor.
{59203}{59290}Tell me, what is your secret ?|How do you find yourself|in the right position all the time ?
{59294}{59338}That-That-That's|a good question.
{59342}{59435}What-What happens is, the-the-the|centre has-has the ball first.
{59439}{59486}And-And-And the quarterback|will say, ""Hike.""
{59490}{59582}That's when the c-center puts the ball|in-into the hands of the quarterback.
{59586}{59659}So what l do is,|l-l start tacklin' the quarterback,
{59663}{59718}unless he give the ball|to-to s-somebody else,
{59722}{59797}in which case,|l-l try to tackle that person.
{59841}{59934}Hmm ? Gentleman, which brings me|to my next point:
{59937}{59983}Don't smoke crack.
{60044}{60086}- [ Chattering ]|- [ Horn Honking ]
{60218}{60323}Vicki Vallencourt.|What you doin' here ?
{60327}{60391}0h, nothin'.|l was just thinkin'...
{60393}{60477}about stealin' L.T.'s Porsche|over there.
{60480}{60582}But l suppose l ought to|be movin' on before l get you|in trouble with your mama.
{60586}{60702}Well, Mr Coach Klein said that|what Mama don't know won't hurt her.
{60705}{60819}So maybe we could|ride home together.
{60823}{60913}- Really ?|- lf you'd like to.
{60916}{60978}[ Giggling ]|0kay.
{60981}{61057}[ Man ]|- Who got the hooch --
{61104}{61215}- Who got the hooch|Baby -
{61219}{61338}- Who got the only|sweetest thing in the world -
{61341}{61465}- - Who got the hooch, baby -|- [ Snoring ]
{61468}{61586}- Who got the only|sweetest thing in the world -
{61590}{61705}- Who got the love|Who got the freshy freshy -
{61708}{61769}- Who got the only|sweetest thing -
{61772}{61842}- - ln the world --|- [ Braying ]
{61925}{61970}You can sit down,|if you'd like.
{61973}{62035}[ Braying Continues ]
{62039}{62101}Vicki Vallencourt,|l figured...
{62104}{62195}'cause you're interested in astrology|and mystical stuff like that,
{62199}{62255}you might appreciate this.
{62301}{62379}That's water|from a glacier in Alaska.
{62383}{62490}lt-lt was blessed|by a-an Eskimo medicine man.
{62494}{62630}- lt's cold !|- Yes, it's always cold.|That's why it's so special.
{63009}{63081}That-That was--|That-That-That-That happened--
{63084}{63186}That-That happened to be|my-my first time with-with lips...
{63189}{63282}and-and-and-and-and|and-and-and-and-and the-the tongue.
{63285}{63374}That was your tongue.|l-- l believe it was--
{63377}{63427}l never did that before.
{63431}{63475}Well, if that was|your first kiss,
{63479}{63574}then l bet it's the first time|you've seen a pair of these.
{63632}{63720}Yes, yes, that is|a-another first for me,
{63724}{63823}and l-l appreciate what-what-what|you're showin' me right now.
{63827}{63891}[ Snoring Continues ]
{63895}{63970}Vicki-Vicki Vallencourt,|l-l think Mama's up.
{64026}{64105}[ Mumbling ]|Devil, devil, devil.
{64108}{64173}You better get goin'.
{64217}{64319}My God, Bobby, l mean, sometimes,|l just don't know why l bother with you.
{64323}{64378}You ain't even a man.
{64461}{64548}[ Announcer ] lt looks like|the Cinderella S.C.L.S.U. Mud Dogs,
{64552}{64604}led by linebacker|Bobby Boucher,
{64608}{64695}are gonna fall one victory short|of that Bourbon Bowl bid.
{64699}{64775}lowa could win the game|by nailing this 20-yard field goal.
{64779}{64843}Yeah, but the Mud Dogs have played|a sensational football game.
{64847}{64954}Let's take a look at the way Boucher|entered the Hawkeyes' last drive.
{64957}{65038}Here we see Boucher|instantly penetratin' the pocket.
{65042}{65091}[ Grunting ]
{65095}{65177}There's a lot of pain|and shame in those eyes.
{65180}{65221}Friends, it's all over.
{65224}{65307}- [ Man ] My leg !|- Wow, that is a disturbing image.
{65311}{65367}Difficult to watch, Chris.|[ Exhales ]
{65371}{65436}Whoo ! My God !
{65440}{65542}Gonna kick some names|and take some ass !
{65546}{65603}Bobby !
{65607}{65685}Water sucks.|Gatorade is better.
{65688}{65755}- What ?|- Use it on the field.
{65759}{65823}[ Crowd Chanting ]|Waterboy, Waterboy, Waterboy !
{66006}{66118}Gatorade not only quenches your thirst|better, it tastes better, too, idiot.
{66122}{66194}You're-You're-You're drinkin'|the wrong water.
{66197}{66290}- Gatorade.|- H20.
{66294}{66398}- Gatorade !|- H20 !
{66402}{66506}- Water sucks, lt really, really sucks|Water sucks -
{66510}{66591}- - lt really, really sucks --|- Stop saying that. You don't|mean that. You're bad people.
{66769}{66846}[ Bobby Whimpering ]
{67040}{67102}- [ Cheering ]|- [ Announcer ] And my friend, Chris,
{67106}{67177}the Mud Dogs are goin'|to the Bourbon Bowl.
{67236}{67308}With yesterday's come-from-behind|victory, the S.C.L.S.U. Mud Dogs...
{67312}{67378}earned a New Year's Day date with Red|Beaulieu and the Louisiana Cougars...
{67382}{67427}in the first annual|Bourbon Bowl.
{67431}{67510}But not only has the waterboy|changed S.C.L.S.U.'s fortunes,
{67513}{67571}he's got other teams looking|around the sidelines for talent.
{67575}{67655}ln fact, yesterday, Michigan,|devastated by injury,
{67659}{67719}experimented with their towel boy|at wide receiver.
{67723}{67837}- [ Groaning ]|- But the towel boy ran into|a laundry list of problems.
{67856}{67933}[ Cheering ]
{68363}{68435}You know, when l see|so many of you here tonight,
{68439}{68562}it reminds me just about how special|this season really was.
{68566}{68617}Not just for the team.
{68620}{68677}Not just for the students.
{68680}{68749}But for each and every|one of you...
{68752}{68841}in our small corner|of Louisiana !
{68844}{68935}- [ Cheering ]|- You can do it !
{68939}{69037}0h, yes, we can,|and, yes, we will.
{69040}{69083}Because we've got...
{69087}{69191}a young man who has been|so vital to our success.
{69195}{69266}A wonderful student-athlete.
{69308}{69378}And a wonderful friend.
{69381}{69450}Ladies and gentlemen,|Bobby Boucher !
{69454}{69502}-- [ Band ]
{69587}{69695}- [ Together ] Waterboy, number one !|- You can do it !
{69849}{69899}Thank you so much...
{69903}{69950}for bein' my friends.
{69953}{70051}- [ Crowd Cheering ]|- You can do it !
{70055}{70135}l'd also like to take|this opportunity...
{70139}{70210}to tell you that my mama|don't know how l play football,
{70213}{70326}so if-if you could not tell|my mama l-l play football,|that would be for the best.
{70329}{70394}[ Cheering ]
{70398}{70443}-- [ Band Resumes ]
{70508}{70570}[ Horn Honking ]
{70773}{70886}We must be a little lost. We're tryin'|to get to the Bourbon Bowl.
{70889}{70963}Looks like we ended up|in Retardville, U.S.A.
{71041}{71139}Hey, Waterboy, you fixin'|to tackle all of us ?
{71182}{71275}- Kick his water-lovin' ass, Greg.|- l asked you a question, dumb ass.
{71306}{71410}You even exhale,|and l will saw your head off.
{71414}{71490}You can do it !|Cut his fucking head off !
{71533}{71619}Hold it, hold it. Just a minute.|Now what is the problem here, honey ?
{71623}{71705}l mean, whatever it is,|we don't want this to get physical.
{71708}{71753}Right, Klein ?
{71756}{71818}[ Vicki ] Yeah, well, your team actin'|like a bunch of shitheads.
{71822}{71950}This is not how ambassadors|for the University of Louisiana|are supposed to act.
{71952}{72063}So now you just get back on the bus.|[ Chuckling ]
{72067}{72170}However,|assault with a deadly weapon,
{72173}{72230}very, very serious offence.
{72233}{72335}0fficer, get her|little country ass outta here.
{72339}{72405}- [ Crowd Murmuring ]|- Thank you, Vicki.
{72408}{72473}Let's go.
{72476}{72591}Ah ! lt's the waterboy !
{72595}{72639}l got something for you.
{72643}{72755}This is his transcript from|South Lafayette High School...
{72759}{72810}in Cherokee Plains,|Louisiana.
{72814}{72870}Now, the problem with that...
{72873}{72993}is there ain't no South Lafayette High|School in Cherokee Plains, Louisiana.
{72996}{73097}- So obviously, this is a fake !|- [ Crowd Gasping ]
{73100}{73196}However, this is not a fake.
{73200}{73262}This is from the N.C.A.A.
{73265}{73326}They don't think you ought|to play football no more.
{73365}{73426}So allow me to say this to you|one more time:
{73430}{73474}You're fired.
{73478}{73550}0h, no !|We suck again !
{73553}{73636}Ever see a championship ring ?
{73640}{73722}- Don't be messin' with the champ.|Come on, Laski.|- You didn't go to high school ?
{73725}{73802}l was home schooled.|l-l didn't know l needed--
{73806}{73910}- Forged a fake transcript.|- No, no, l-l-l didn't.
{73914}{73978}- The waterboy's a cheater.|Cut his head off.|- [ Crowd Agreeing ]
{73981}{74071}Listen, everybody !|This don't change nothin' !
{74075}{74150}We played as a team,|we won as a team.
{74153}{74203}And just because|the waterboy's a cheater,
{74207}{74273}don't change the fact|that the real Mud Dogs...
{74276}{74334}are gonna kick|some Cougar ass.
{74338}{74391}Mud Dogs ! Mud Dogs !
{74395}{74506}[ Together ] Mud Dogs !|Mud Dogs ! Mud Dogs ! Mud Dogs !
{74509}{74603}Mud Dogs ! Mud Dogs ! Mud Dogs !|Mud Dogs ! Mud Dogs !
{74607}{74698}Mud Dogs ! Mud Dogs ! Mud Dogs !|Mud Dogs ! Mud Dogs ! Mud Dogs !
{74701}{74746}- That's the way !|- [ Cheering ]
{74908}{74966}Sorry, Bobby.
{75014}{75126}- 0h, what a lonely boy -
{75130}{75214}Believe me,|l-l understand.
{75217}{75276}Yeah, and you're|deeply appreciated, Mr Dodd.
{75280}{75362}Thank you so much.|Bye-bye.
{75366}{75418}Good news, Bobby.
{75422}{75503}- The N.C.A.A. is gonna allow you|to play in the Bourbon Bowl.|- Yes.
{75507}{75559}You just have to pass the high school|equivalency test.
{75563}{75641}lt's not the test, Coach.
{75644}{75722}Everybody hates me.
{75725}{75810}That's not true.
{75814}{75889}0ne man said he wanted|to decapitate me.
{75892}{75982}Nobody else thought that|to be too bad of an idea.
{76052}{76107}Somebody made me|look like a-a-a cheater.
{76111}{76195}l did it. l did it. l did it !|l did it ! l did it !
{76199}{76290}- lt was me.|- Why ?
{76376}{76495}Because l wanted you to play.|Because you were my way out, Bobby.
{76499}{76573}'Cause it was the only way|to get you in.
{76576}{76637}l am so sorry.
{76640}{76706}Why didn't you s-stick up for me|down by the river ?
{76782}{76874}The truth is, l fled.
{76877}{76941}l came into my office,|l went under my desk, l cried.
{76944}{77025}l cried. l cried|like a ten-year-old girl !
{77028}{77078}[ Groaning ]
{77199}{77246}Red and l have a history.
{77249}{77301}Twenty years ago,|we were assistants to Coach Cavanaugh...
{77304}{77385}at the University|of Louisiana.
{77388}{77472}Red ran the practices,|and l used to come up with the plays.
{77508}{77557}0h, boy, was l good.
{77600}{77713}l would write these foolproof plays|in my little green notebook that l had.
{77716}{77790}- The opposition|didn't even know what hit 'em.|- [ Door Knocking ]
{77793}{77838}And when Coach Cavanaugh|was going to retire,
{77841}{77923}me and Red, we just knew that one of us|was gonna be his successor.
{77927}{78001}-- [ Disco ]
{78004}{78061}- Hey, Red.|- How ya doin' ?
{78109}{78161}Come by to wish me luck ?
{78164}{78297}Well, not exactly, no, no.|Actually, l come by to get you|to do ol' Red a little favour.
{78300}{78351}Sure. What's up ?
{78355}{78449}Well, you know that green|notebook you use to write|all them football plays in ?
{78452}{78553}Well, l need to show Cavanaugh that|l can come up with some good play ideas.
{78556}{78625}But you didn't come up|with them.
{78628}{78706}They're my plays.|l need them.
{78710}{78842}Klein, l'm gonna have|this book one way or another,
{78845}{78914}so you might as well let the damn|thing go, 'cause if you don't,
{78917}{78982}it's gonna get awfully,|awfully physical around here.
{78986}{79070}And l don't think|you want that, do you ? Huh ?
{79106}{79162}[ Cackling ]
{79166}{79267}0f course, Red got the job.|Next day, fired me.
{79271}{79322}0nce he had my notebook,|he didn't need me any more.
{79380}{79424}l didn't take it very well.
{79428}{79514}No, Grandma,|l didn't get it.
{79517}{79572}l can't believe it myself.
{79576}{79689}l know.|l'm so numb.
{79692}{79751}l just hate him,|l hate him, l hate him.
{79797}{79857}That is a terrible story, Coach.
{79860}{79938}- But why-why don't you just|come up with some new plays ?|- l tried.
{79942}{79986}- l can't.|- Yes.
{79990}{80114}l guess l have a mental block,|you know, ever since Red took|my playbook and my manhood.
{80118}{80202}l knew what he was gonna do !
{80206}{80274}And l just didn't fight back.
{80278}{80367}Well, you're gonna show him|that you're a man on Saturday.
{80414}{80458}And l'm gonna show everybody|that l'm not a dummy.
{80462}{80538}l'm gonna go study.
{80544}{80650}-- [ Fiddle ]
{80654}{80758}Mama, maybe you could stop brushin'|my hair so l can read.
{80762}{80813}Read ?
{80816}{80888}You don't have to read.
{80941}{81028}- What you readin' for ?|- 'Cause l enjoys it, Mama.
{81032}{81115}Don't look like to me you enjoys it,|sittin' there all grouchy.
{81119}{81226}Mama, l gotta read this book|and six other books tonight,|or else l can't play foot--
{81325}{81370}ball.
{81373}{81472}Fool's ball ? You playin'|the fool's ball behind my back ?
{81476}{81536}The only reason l'm doin' this|so, so l can go to school.
{81540}{81647}School ? You goin' to school ?|[ Screams ]
{81651}{81708}- [ Steve Braying ]|- Sorry, Mama. l wanted to tell you.
{81712}{81816}You off gallivantin' with your fancy|fool's ball friends at school,
{81820}{81932}while l'm sittin' here all day|with nobody to keep me company,|except Steve ?
{81989}{82042}The chickens are comin' home|to roost, Bobby Boucher.
{82045}{82131}You reap the fruit|of your selfish ways.
{82135}{82186}You're gonna lose all your|fancy fool's ball games...
{82190}{82264}and you're gonna fail your big exam,|because school is--
{82268}{82312}- The devil ?|- [ Gasps ]
{82316}{82391}Everything is the devil|to you, Mama !
{82395}{82486}Well, l like school,|and l like football !
{82490}{82574}And l'm gonna keep doin' them both|because they make me feel good !
{82611}{82673}And by the way, Mama,|alligators are ornery...
{82676}{82737}because of their|medulla oblongata !
{82881}{82951}And l like Vicki,|and she likes me back !
{82955}{83014}And she showed me her boobies,|and l liked them too !
{83347}{83453}The Louisiana High School|Equivalency Examination...
{83456}{83534}consists of 300|multiple choice questions.
{83538}{83624}You have three hours.|Good luck to you, sir.
{83847}{83914}[ Knocking 0n Window ]
{84000}{84070}- Well, l was born|in a small town -
{84074}{84158}- And l live|in a small town -
{84193}{84259}- lf l could die|in a small town -
{84263}{84382}- 0r the small communities -
{84385}{84446}Ben Franklin.
{84496}{84562}Mama, when did Ben Franklin|invent electricity ?
{84566}{84652}That's nonsense !|l invented electricity.
{84656}{84718}Ben Franklin is the devil !
{84979}{85040}l can't believe|you got a 97 !
{85044}{85095}l-l-l can't believe|that l-l-l told Mama...
{85099}{85148}that l got feelings for you.
{85152}{85240}Well, welcome to your manhood,|Bobby Boucher.
{85244}{85312}When we get a little more time,|l'll welcome you properly.
{85316}{85371}Yes, once again, l'm not quite sure|what that means, but--
{85375}{85419}- [ Siren Wailing ]|- You know, we should get goin'.
{85423}{85467}l told the coach that|l'd drive to the game with him.
{85471}{85548}[ Tyres Screeching ]
{85552}{85623}l was with you from two to four|last night. You-You tell them.
{85627}{85671}- [ Brakes Screech ]|- [ Car Door 0pens ]
{85677}{85795}Bobby, your mama got sick this mornin'.|She's in the hospital.
{85857}{85910}Mama, what have l done ?
{85914}{85958}l'm so sorry, Mama.
{86043}{86153}Doctors say... they can't figure out|what's wrong with her.
{86156}{86206}But l know what's wrong.
{86210}{86262}She got a broken heart|because of me.
{86265}{86314}Bobby, that's ridiculous.
{86317}{86428}Everybody else in this town|turn on me at the drop of a hat.
{86432}{86514}Mama is the only one who really cares|if l live or die.
{86517}{86574}She my whole world.
{86613}{86678}Will you just|leave us alone ?
{86681}{86761}She'll be fine, Bobby.|We better get going.
{86764}{86823}God knows what the team is doing|with just Farmer Fran watching them.
{86827}{86912}- [ Shouting, lndistinct ]|- -- [ Rock ]
{87074}{87122}[ Woman 0n P.A.,|lndistinct ]
{87318}{87398}- Everybody parties|on the New Year's Eve -
{87402}{87466}- You really made it look like home.|- - Waiting for the countdown -
{87470}{87550}- Make a lot of promises|they never keep -
{87553}{87636}- Party with the lights on -
{87640}{87707}- How's that, Steve ?|- [ Brays ]
{87711}{87796}- Holding a glass|of champagne -
{87800}{87878}- - Everyone having fun -|- [ Steve Braying ]
{87882}{87954}- Trying to get out|of the rain -
{87958}{88050}- Everybody parties|on the New Year's Eve -
{88054}{88114}- Party with the lights on -
{88118}{88202}Take a look. The crowd has|never been bigger. You know why ?
{88205}{88263}- Look who's on the television, Mama.|- [ TV Continues ]
{88267}{88311}The devil.
{88315}{88359}500,000 intimate--
{88363}{88431}- Party on New Year's Eve -
{88435}{88510}- - Tell me what to see -|- [ No Audio ]
{88514}{88589}- The peak of|the holiday season -
{88592}{88672}- - Everything's all right with me -|- Who there ? Who there ?
{88676}{88742}- Bringing in a new year --
{88989}{89066}[ Crowd ]|Three, two, one !
{89069}{89136}- Happy New Year !|- Happy New Year, Mama.
{89191}{89298}- -- [ ""Auld Lang Syne"" ]|- My resolution is to|never hurt you again.
{89302}{89392}[ Snoring ]
{89397}{89559}- Should auld acquaintance|be forgot -
{89563}{89684}- - And days of auld lang syne --|- [ Crowd Chanting ]|Waterboy ! Waterboy !
{89688}{89777}Waterboy ! Waterboy !
{89780}{89826}[ Cheering ]
{90335}{90426}Bobby Boucher, all these folks|are here tonight...
{90430}{90479}to tell you that|they're sorry--
{90483}{90530}that they're sorry|for not supportin' you...
{90534}{90591}when it meant the most.
{90595}{90688}But you do have friends,|and one of 'em wants to say somethin'.
{90692}{90736}Come on.
{90808}{90902}l am not what you|would call a handsome man.
{90942}{91022}The good Lord chose not|to bless me with--
{91025}{91159}with charm, athletic ability|or a fully functional brain.
{91195}{91292}You see,|you're an inspiration...
{91296}{91378}to all of us who,|who weren't born handsome...
{91382}{91510}and charming|and cool and--
{91514}{91586}[ Sobbing ]
{91619}{91663}- l can't ! l can't !|- lt's okay.
{91667}{91774}Bobby, if your mama|could only hear us right now,
{91777}{91835}we would tell her...
{91839}{91910}what a fine boy she raised,
{91913}{91996}and how much your playing football|means to this town.
{92028}{92106}But she can't hear you,|'cause she's unconscious.
{92148}{92218}l'm sorry|to disappoint you all,
{92222}{92284}but please keep|your voices down...
{92288}{92349}so my mama|can get her rest.
{92471}{92518}[ All Groaning ]
{92556}{92648}Well, wake her ass up !|We gotta win tomorrow !
{93008}{93074}[ Woman 0n P.A.,|lndistinct ]
{93172}{93274}Mama ! Thank God, you're okay.|l'm so sorry.
{93278}{93335}l was so bad, Mama.|You were right about everything.
{93339}{93391}- l've been a real knucklehead.|- 0h, hush, baby.
{93395}{93474}You should've seen this|a long time ago.
{93478}{93522}0h, my word !
{93526}{93590}- ls that my daddy ?|- No, no.
{93593}{93666}That's a guy l dated|before l met your father.
{93670}{93734}0h, you could iron|a shirt on his stomach.
{93738}{93824}Well, that was lust, not love.|Turn the page.
{93908}{93954}There's your daddy.
{93958}{94014}- So handsome.|- 0h.
{94018}{94062}Read on.
{94117}{94175}""Dear Helen.""|Who's Helen ?
{94226}{94271}That's my first name, Bobby.
{94275}{94335}0hh !
{94379}{94434}""l have arrived here|in New 0rleans.
{94437}{94509}""lt is even more beautiful|than in the picture books.
{94512}{94576}""l'm sure l'll have|no problem finding work,
{94580}{94677}""so you can expect my next letter|to contain lots of money.
{94680}{94728}Your loving husband, Robert.''
{94732}{94776}That's nice, Mama.
{94780}{94882}""Dear Helen.""|That's you.
{94886}{94962}""l found a job|as a lemonade vendor,
{94965}{95014}""but sorry,|no money yet.
{95017}{95078}""New 0rleans is|an expensive city.
{95082}{95168}""Expensive, but fun.|Hope all is well.
{95172}{95236}Robert.''
{95239}{95298}""To Whom lt May Concern:
{95301}{95367}""This will be my last letter.
{95371}{95457}""We have grown apart|over these last six weeks.
{95460}{95552}""l now have|two loves in my life:
{95556}{95662}""big-city livin' and|a voodoo woman named Phyllis.
{95665}{95734}Ciao, Roberto.''
{95738}{95815}He changed his name|to Roberto.
{95819}{95880}l guess he thought|it was more exotic.
{95884}{95954}But Mama says that--|l mean, you say that--
{95957}{96058}Bobby, your daddy didn't|go into no Peace Corps.
{96100}{96148}He deserted us, baby.
{96196}{96240}No, no, Mama.|You-You--
{96244}{96308}You shouldn't be dredgin' up these|painful memories in your condition.
{96311}{96378}0h, hush. Your mama's|as healthy as an ox,
{96382}{96438}and as dumb as one to boot.
{96441}{96498}l was so scared|you'd abandon me too.
{96502}{96627}And l made you abandon|all those people who depend on ya.
{96631}{96696}l hid you away from the world,|Bobby Boucher.
{96700}{96779}But l can't hog you|to myself no more,
{96783}{96860}because everyone's seen|how wonderful you are.
{96898}{96978}- 0h, Mama !|- Now.
{97063}{97136}You go play fool's ball|with your friends.
{97141}{97210}[ Man ] Welcome to ABC's coverage|of the Bourbon Bowl.
{97214}{97295}Good afternoon, everybody.|l'm Brent Musburger,|along with my colleague, Dan Fouts.
{97299}{97387}And the big story here, Dan, is a game|that's lost some of its lustre...
{97391}{97478}without its star player,|the waterboy Bobby Boucher.
{97481}{97546}You know, Red's got a couple|of solid early rounders out there.
{97550}{97635}l know, but l really wanted to scout|that waterboy. Reminds me of Greg Lloyd.
{97639}{97695}- Naw. ""Zack"" Thomas.|- Whatever.
{97699}{97743}- ls she ready ?|- [ Clattering ]
{97747}{97811}0h, yeah.|She's more than ready.
{97815}{97910}Come on, Bobby !|You'll miss the boat !
{98003}{98047}Let's go, ladies.
{98126}{98182}[ Whistle Blowing ]
{98185}{98231}[ Musburger ]|We are underway !
{98235}{98294}The opening kickoff|is a beauty !
{98368}{98432}Holdsworth is gonna bring it out|from nine yards deep.
{98435}{98472}- Come on.|- [ Grunting ]
{98476}{98528}- Yeah !|- [ Grunting, Groaning ]
{98532}{98638}Dan, they're showing no respect|for this team without Boucher.
{98641}{98719}[ Fouts ] Good reason, Brent.|109 yards untouched.
{98723}{98784}-[ Cheering ]|-Touchdown, Cougars ! They strike first.
{98828}{98884}[ Yelling, Shouting ]
{98956}{99004}-[ Whistle Blowing ]|-Time running down in the first quarter.
{99008}{99060}Cougars lead is 17-0.
{99107}{99154}Set !
{99157}{99202}Three ! Thirty-three !
{99205}{99291}- [ Growling ]|- Three ! Thirty-three ! Hut !
{99346}{99403}Dan, that quarterback can't even|get the ball off before he's hit.
{99407}{99458}lt's as if they're in|the offensive huddle with him.
{99462}{99554}- [ Laughing ]|- [ Muttering ]
{99557}{99613}Are you gonna finish|that hot dog, Jimmy ?
{99616}{99670}Ugh ! Now l'm not.
{99673}{99743}[ Bobby ] Mama, you think|we'll make it on time ?
{99747}{99838}Hang on ! l'll show you what|A.J. Foyt taught me.
{99936}{100001}[ Musburger ] That's the end of|the half. The Cougars are dominating.
{100004}{100097}Let's hope the Mud Dogs|can make some adjustments.
{100100}{100145}- Well, they better, 'cause they suck.|- Mm-hmm.
{100289}{100341}Anybody got an idea ?
{100441}{100486}Hey.
{100530}{100630}- Remember the time Bobby tackled|the referee by mistake ?|- [ Chuckling ]
{100633}{100689}Yeah, that was pretty funny.
{100692}{100748}How about the time he tackled|the guy from Louisville...
{100752}{100818}- and threw him into the stands ?|- [ All Laughing ]
{100861}{100974}Y'all remember when he intercepted|the ball and his pants fell off ?
{100978}{101057}And then he ran for|the touchdown, bare-assed.
{101109}{101210}Remember the time Bobby--|[ Mumbling lncoherently ]
{101348}{101436}Remember when Bobby Boucher|showed up at halftime and the|Mud Dogs won the Bourbon Bowl ?
{101440}{101502}[ Cheering, Shouting ]
{101596}{101706}Hey, sorry about givin' you|so much shit this year.
{101709}{101762}You're the heart and soul|of this team, Bobby.
{101765}{101829}And the only one of us|who could've passed that test.
{101832}{101922}Thank you all so much|for being my friends.
{101925}{102006}Well, let's wait till later|to hold hands and kiss.|We got a Bowl game to win.
{102010}{102051}- Right ?|- [ All Together ] Yeah !
{102055}{102113}- Two, three !|- [ All ] Mud Dogs ! Woof !
{102117}{102185}[ Musburger ]|ln a dramatic turn of events,
{102189}{102261}Bobby Boucher|just arrived at halftime.
{102265}{102368}And on a fan boat, Brent. His mother|drove him right into the stadium.
{102477}{102582}[ Players Shouting,|Hooting ]
{102586}{102653}[ Crowd Chanting ]|Waterboy ! Waterboy !
{102657}{102735}Waterboy ! Waterboy !
{102738}{102806}Waterboy ! Waterboy !
{102810}{102874}Fool's ball's|not for the devil.
{102877}{102921}lt's for my Bobby.
{102925}{103022}Time to open up|some whoop-ass.
{103074}{103166}[ Cheering, Chanting|Continues ]
{103170}{103260}Shit, he showed up.|All right, look.
{103264}{103365}Just relax. Relax. Go in there and|do exactly like we planned. Go, go, go !
{103369}{103436}This could be the start|of some high drama, folks.
{103440}{103492}0r are the Mud Dogs|too far behind ?
{103496}{103556}Bobby Boucher|is on defence.
{103560}{103642}- The Cougars are coming out|from their own 20 yard line.|- [ Quarterback ] Hut ! Hut !
{103646}{103706}The pitch.|lt's a reverse !
{103710}{103768}Boucher's not fooled.
{103772}{103838}Fumble !|Robideaux's got it !
{103842}{103881}Touchdown, Mud Dogs !
{103885}{103931}[ Growling ]
{103934}{104022}- Boy, Boucher knocked|the poop out of him.|- ""Poop"" ?
{104026}{104099}[ All Shouting ]
{104102}{104147}Slap hands !|Slap hands !
{104192}{104292}Drink up, now. l want you girls to|sober up. Have faith in my Bobby.
{104295}{104368}[ Musburger ] The Mud Dogs are|faced with yet another third and long.
{104372}{104420}- Hut !|- Grenouille back to pass.
{104424}{104550}He's gonna be stuffed again !|And the Mud Dogs offence is|still unable to move that ball.
{104554}{104630}But the way their defence|is fired up, they still have|a shot at winning this game.
{104634}{104682}Blake, come here. Look.
{104686}{104768}Now, what if we, uh--|[ Whispering ]
{104822}{104901}Trust me. Go, go, go, go, go.|[ Evil Laughter ]
{104905}{105011}[ Musburger ] The Cougars lead 27-7 in|the middle of the third quarter.
{105014}{105062}- And he takes a knee ?|- [ Whistle Blows ]
{105066}{105155}- Y'all gonna play or what ?|- [ Chattering ]
{105158}{105236}[ Laughing ]|How do you all like my new offence ?
{105310}{105354}[ Musburger ]|All right, it's second and 12...
{105358}{105444}- as the Cougars line up on the ball.|- Hut ! Hut !
{105448}{105494}[ Whistle Blows ]
{105498}{105574}What is Red Beaulieu doing,|refusing to play offence ?
{105578}{105643}- Dan, this is bizarre.|- [ Dan ] No, it's not, Brent.
{105646}{105725}lt's brilliant, because Red is|taking the waterboy out of the game.
{105729}{105788}By kneeling down|three times and punting,
{105792}{105839}he's gonna make the Mud Dog|offence try to beat him.
{105842}{105899}And the way they're playing|today, that's impossible.
{105902}{105951}[ Musburger ] Well, the Mud Dog's|most valuable player,
{105954}{106029}the linebacker they call ""the Waterboy,""|is now powerless.
{106033}{106156}That means Coach Klein will have|to find another way to outfox Red.
{106159}{106263}- [ Whistle Blows ]|- [ Man ] Mud Dogs call a time-out.
{106268}{106330}- [ Cheering, lndistinct ]|- Mr Coach Klein. Mr Coach Klein !
{106334}{106398}Mr Coach Klein !
{106401}{106500}- Where are you going ?|- l was just gonna get a hot pretzel.
{106504}{106571}Mr Coach Klein, are you afraid|of Red Beaulieu ?
{106574}{106636}[ Laughing, Shouting ]
{106664}{106708}l am petrified of him.
{106712}{106784}Well, why don't you pretend|that Red Beaulieu...
{106788}{106839}is somebody that|you're-you're not afraid of.
{106842}{106906}- Pretend ?|- Yes.
{106910}{106971}Visualize somebody|you're not afraid of.
{106974}{107048}- And then attack, like you told me.|- l'll try.
{107052}{107121}Well, he's right over there.
{107246}{107313}[ Chuckling ]
{107396}{107447}Little baby.
{107450}{107508}Yeah.
{107512}{107628}Hello, little baby.|[ Baby Talking ]
{107693}{107761}A poo-poo ?|Do you have a poo-poo ?
{107765}{107808}Yes.
{107812}{107869}0kay. Now.
{107873}{107929}This is what we're gonna do.|He's gonna come here--
{107933}{107992}[ Chattering, Shouting ]
{108126}{108200}Come and get|this one, Cougars.
{108203}{108259}Red, 22 ! Hike !
{108262}{108333}[ Musburger ]|Snap to Grenouille. A reverse !
{108337}{108425}No, it's a double reverse !|0h, what a block !
{108429}{108472}And Boudier springs free !
{108476}{108589}Trouble ! Lateral !|Got him ! What a play !
{108593}{108682}Grenouille to the 15 !|To the 10 ! To the 5 !
{108686}{108740}- Touchdown, Mud Dogs !|- [ Fouts ] Well, well, well.
{108744}{108806}l guess Coach Klein does have|a few tricks up his sleeve after all.
{108810}{108892}What the hell--|What the hell is this ? Huh ?
{108896}{108977}We go from a championship|football team to a bunch of dogs !
{108981}{109062}Right now, we're going to go down to|the sidelines and our man, Lynn Swann.
{109066}{109116}Swannie, what do|you have for us ?
{109120}{109164}l'm with Vicki Vallencourt,|who's taking over...
{109168}{109238}Bobby Boucher's water duties|for this important game.
{109242}{109313}0h, l'm not takin' over.|l'm just tryin' not to screw up too bad.
{109317}{109396}Well, let me ask you this.|What's your prediction for|the rest of this ball game ?
{109399}{109447}Mud Dogs are gonna win,|30 to 27.
{109450}{109514}That's very interesting.|How'd you come up with that guess ?
{109518}{109598}Guess ? That ain't no guess !|That's what it's gonna be.
{109602}{109672}- 0kay. That's fine.|- 0h ! Be careful down there, Swannie.
{109757}{109819}All right.|Meaney. Where's Meaney ?
{109822}{109867}- Meaney ?|- Here, Coach.
{109870}{109955}- Get in there and let's see if|that waterboy can stop you.|- Yes, sir !
{109958}{110059}Red is sending his best defender in|as a running back ?
{110062}{110121}What do you make of this, Dan ?
{110125}{110178}Well, Brent, he's gotta find|some way to neutralize the waterboy.
{110182}{110262}He probably thinks that Meaney|will just pound it in there like|Fridge used to do for the Bears.
{110266}{110352}Hey, Waterboy ! ls your girlfriend|gonna save you again ?
{110356}{110407}0h, no, sir. l'm gonna take matters|into my own hands.
{110410}{110507}- You'll see.|- Bring it to the hole !|Your ass is mine ! Whoo !
{110510}{110578}Whoo ! Whoo !
{110582}{110631}You sound like a...|a big choo-choo train.
{110634}{110716}Whoo !|[ Groans ]
{110870}{110952}Power bomb, compliments|of Captain lnsano.
{111041}{111113}- Let's go fight|with your might --
{111117}{111184}All right, field goal.|Field goal. Go.
{111187}{111267}- Derek. Derek !|- Yeah.
{111270}{111345}Visualize the attack.|Go kick the ball. Kick it.
{111349}{111391}- Hut !|- [ All Grunting ]
{111429}{111479}How you doin', boy ?|[ Laughing ]
{111482}{111542}No, no, no !|[ Screaming ]
{111611}{111673}[ Cheering, Shouting ]
{111850}{111914}[ Whimpering ]
{112022}{112121}[ Players Shouting,|lndistinct ]
{112125}{112178}What the hell is that ?
{112324}{112408}Where the hell is-- What the hell|is he up to ? That ain't in here ! Huh ?
{112412}{112455}- [ Cheering ]|- Hey !
{112458}{112506}[ Musburger ]|Down by ten late in the fourth quarter,
{112510}{112570}Coach Klein|opts for the field goal.
{112574}{112659}[ Fouts ]|Then they have to hope for the onside|kick and a touchdown to tie the game.
{112662}{112763}Dan, look what we have here.|Boucher's in the game as a blocker.
{112766}{112820}Last game of the year, Brent.|Can't hold anything back now.
{112886}{112944}Set !
{113017}{113063}The snap. lt's a fake !
{113150}{113230}Boucher's out in front !|A great block !
{113234}{113312}- [ Grunting ]|- And a second one !
{113316}{113375}Touchdown, Mud Dogs !
{113378}{113461}- Boucher led him all the way !|- [ Screaming ] Yeah !
{113520}{113565}Red Beaulieu|is steaming, Dan.
{113569}{113624}Brent, he sees his|perfect season slipping away.
{113628}{113713}The Cougar's lead|is down to three.
{113717}{113823}[ Cheerleaders Cheering,|lndistinct ]
{113826}{113904}The Mud Dogs need the ball back if|they're gonna have a shot at overtime.
{113908}{113993}And Bobby Boucher is|now on the kickoff team.
{113997}{114083}- Last game of the year, Brent.|Can't hold anything back now.|- l know.
{114086}{114166}- [ Horns Blaring ]|- Who's it gonna be ?
{114170}{114255}Who's it gonna be ?|Who's it gonna be ?
{114336}{114408}[ Chuckling ]|0h, yeah. There's my bitch.
{114412}{114471}[ Musburger ] Remember,|the ball must travel ten yards.
{114533}{114580}lt's loose !
{114584}{114656}-Mud Dogs football ! Mud Dogs football !|-All right !
{114660}{114709}Mama, l got the football !|l got it--
{114713}{114775}0h, what a vicious hit !|That was a cheap shot.
{114778}{114820}- 0h !|- [ Murmuring ]
{114824}{114883}- [ Whistle Blowing ]|- [ Fouts ] And what a dumb penalty.
{114886}{114964}That puts the Mud Dogs|in field goal range for the tie.
{114968}{115051}- Dan, l'm not sure that Boucher|is able to get back up.|- 0h, my baby !
{115221}{115271}lt's still cold.|[ Chuckles ]
{115274}{115342}- [ Chattering ]|- Excuse me. 0ut of my way.
{115426}{115490}Dan, you hate|to see this happen.
{115693}{115763}Now, that's|high quality H20.
{115766}{115861}- [ Cheering ]|- [ Vicki ] You go on, now !|Make it happen, Bobby !
{115961}{116012}The waterboy|just needed some water.
{116016}{116125}- Wow, Dan. You think that up|all by yourself ?|- Shut up, Brent.
{116205}{116245}- [ Shouting, Yelling ]|- Are you okay ?
{116249}{116300}He tried to open up a can|of whoop-ass on me. l wouldn't let him.
{116303}{116392}Listen, l have an idea for the last|play. You haven't done this before.
{116396}{116440}All right ? The offence|is gonna line up like this.
{116444}{116488}- Yeah.|- You're gonna be right here.
{116492}{116544}[ Musburger ]|There'll be no tie here today.
{116547}{116633}Coach Klein is sending|his offence back on to the field.
{116637}{116686}He's going for|the win right now.
{116690}{116733}[ Fouts ] Yeah, this is|a real gutsy call, Brent.
{116737}{116783}He'll either be a hero|or a goat because of this.
{116786}{116896}[ Musburger ] And Dan,|Bobby Boucher is back on the field.
{116900}{116993}He is now playing offence !|We know. We know.
{116997}{117076}Meaney, if they give|that Waterboy the football,
{117079}{117124}l don't care if you|have to stab him !
{117127}{117180}Do not let him get away.|Do you understand me ?
{117184}{117272}- Yes, sir. Yes, sir !|- Do you understand me ? Get in there !
{117276}{117331}[ All ]|Break !
{117489}{117589}- l'm ready, friend.|- Let's do it, Bobby.
{117618}{117676}Set ! Set !
{117680}{117761}Forty-three ! Set !|Forty-three ! Hut, hut !
{119617}{119686}Touchdown ! They win it !|The Mud Dogs win it !
{119690}{119791}Bobby Boucher's the hero ! He's gone|from waterboy, Dan, to saviour !
{119794}{119845}And it's because he didn't|hold anything back !
{119849}{119932}Well, Swannie's down on the field|with our hero, so let's go to Lynn now !
{120004}{120099}We did it ! l can't believe it !|l can't believe it !
{120102}{120172}- Vicki, l love you !|- Whoo ! l love you, too, baby.
{120176}{120265}We're the champions !|[ Screaming ]
{120269}{120361}Mr Coach Klein, you got your manhood !|You got your manhood !
{120365}{120442}Bobby, congratulations.|You're the M.V.P. of the Bourbon Bowl.
{120446}{120490}How do you feel ?
{120494}{120578}- l love Mama !|- [ Cheering ]
{121018}{121078}- There you go, Bobby !|- Lookin' sharp, Bobby !
{121082}{121126}[ Man ]|You the man, Bobby !
{121130}{121192}Bobby, l've been dreading|this day for a long time.
{121196}{121277}- But you got yourself a fine woman.|- 0h, thank you, Mama.
{121281}{121348}Good luck, son.
{121352}{121397}This is the best day|of my life !
{121434}{121484}You just wait till tonight.
{121488}{121552}- What's gonna happen tonight ?|- [ Chuckles ] You'll see.
{121556}{121682}You can do it !|You can do it all night long !
{121686}{121763}[ Cheering, Shouting ]
{121766}{121834}l'm gonna go do it !
{121961}{122036}- [ Tyres Screech ]|- Bobby, it's me !
{122040}{122124}- Your daddy, Roberto.|- Daddy ?
{122128}{122244}l've seen you on the ESPN|when they was talkin' about|you being drafted by the NFL.
{122248}{122335}Not going to the NFL.|l'm gonna stay in school and graduate.
{122338}{122430}The hell with school, dopey ! Take the|money ! You and me could be partners,
{122434}{122516}- just like that Tiger Woods|and his daddy.|- [ Mama Screaming ]
{122520}{122578}- Uh-oh.|- [ Screaming ]
{122582}{122630}- [ Grunting ]|- [ All Gasping ]
{122634}{122722}[ Crowd Cheering ]
{122726}{122799}- Nice hit, Mama.|- Thanks, baby.
{122802}{122857}Now, you go on and have|some fun becoming a man.
{123098}{123214}- l don't remember|what day it was -
{123252}{123358}- l didn't notice|what time it was -
{123403}{123536}- All l know is that|l fell in love with you -
{123540}{123608}- And if all my dreams|come true -
{123611}{123699}- l'll be spending time|with you -
{123702}{123768}- Every day's a new day -
{123771}{123844}- ln love with you -
{123847}{123920}- With each day|comes a new way -
{123924}{123996}- 0f loving you -
{124000}{124074}- Every time|l kiss your lips -
{124078}{124144}- My mind starts to wander -
{124148}{124213}- And if all my dreams|come true -
{124217}{124308}- l'll be spending time|with you -
{124311}{124414}- l love you more today|than yesterday -
{124472}{124595}- But not as much as tomorrow -
{124598}{124716}- 0h, l love you more today|than yesterday -
{124751}{124824}- But, darling, not as much -
{124828}{124911}- As tomorrow -
{124914}{125024}- Tomorrow may see springtime|just a day away -
{125028}{125066}- Day away -
{125070}{125178}- Cupid, we don't need you now|Be on your way -
{125182}{125216}- 0n your way -
{125220}{125286}- Thank the Lord|for love like ours -
{125290}{125356}- That grows ever stronger -
{125360}{125421}- And if all my dreams|come true -
{125425}{125508}- l'll be spending time|with you -
{125511}{125628}- 0h, l love you more today|than yesterday -
{125683}{125802}- But not as much as tomorrow -
{125806}{125927}- 0h, l love you more today|than yesterday -
{125965}{126036}- But, darling, not as much -
{126040}{126121}- As tomorrow -
{126125}{126201}- Every day's a new day -
{126205}{126276}- Every time l love ya -
{126280}{126350}- Every way's a new way -
{126354}{126428}- - Every time l love ya -|- - Every day -
{126431}{126504}- - Every day's a new day -|- - Every day -
{126507}{126577}- - Every time l love ya -|- - Every day -
{126581}{126655}- - Every way's a new way -|- - Every day -
{126658}{126703}- Every time l love ya -
{126706}{126770}- - Every time l love ya -|- - Every day -
{126773}{126864}- Every day -
{126867}{126937}- - Every time l love ya -|- - Every day -
{126941}{126996}- Every day -
{126999}{127091}- - Every time l love ya -|- - Every day -
{127094}{127145}- Every day --
