{1631}{1692}Houston,this is Condor.
{1693}{1767}We are doing an E.V.A.|of the payload.
{1768}{1871}We are aboutto present|the module with--
{1872}{1923}Whatthe--
{1924}{2017}Oh, my gentle Jesus.
{2018}{2091}Houston...we have a problem.
{2119}{2193}Launch procedure commence.
{2679}{2729}Oh, God!
{2761}{2819}And l'm spent.
{2858}{2896}Do you smoke after sex?
{2897}{2955}l don't know, baby.|l never looked.
{3033}{3073}Oh,Austin!
{3113}{3159}What shall we do now?
{3160}{3223}Well, l've got an idea.|Why don'twe shag?
{3224}{3276}-Again?|-Sure, baby.
{3277}{3336}We're only upto chapter eleven|in the ''Kama Sutra.''
{3337}{3398}Don'tyou wantto try|the wheelbarrow...
{3399}{3436}orthe praying donkey...
{3437}{3485}orthe Chinese shag swing?
{3486}{3586}l'm going to get us|some more champagne,jungle boy.
{3587}{3651}l'm going to get us|some more champagne,jungle boy.
{3761}{3810}Are you OK?
{3811}{3881}l've neverfelt better,Austin.
{3882}{3935}All right,then.
{3936}{4032}l'm just gonna go watch a movie.
{4091}{4190}''ln Like Flint.''|That's myfavorite movie.
{4392}{4427}Vanessa.
{4428}{4493}What's going on?
{4522}{4571}l don't know whatyou mean,|Austin.
{4572}{4613}l'm the same Vane--
{4665}{4710}You must be--
{4711}{4782}Tu imaginacion|esta jugando con ti, querido.
{4783}{4813}Oh, my God!
{4965}{5007}You're afembot!
{5008}{5053}No shit, Sherlock!
{5091}{5159}Machine gun jubblies?
{5160}{5246}How did l miss those, baby?
{5247}{5324}Perhaps nexttime|you should tryforeplay.
{5325}{5378}Right. Oh, my God!
{5826}{5886}Here's yourwedding present,|Mr. Powers.
{5887}{5950}A kamikaze bridefrom me--
{5951}{6001}Dr. Evil.
{6297}{6347}Oh,thank God.
{6511}{6572}l can't believe Vanessa...
{6572}{6624}my bride...
{6625}{6696}my one true love...
{6697}{6797}the woman who taught me|the beauty of monogamy...
{6798}{6882}was afembot all along.
{6919}{6955}Wait a tick.
{6956}{7009}That means l'm single again!
{7010}{7048}Oh, behave!
{7086}{7130}Yeah!
{7131}{7187}Yeah, baby,yeah!
{7188}{7230}Halt!
{7748}{7789}Yeah, baby,yeah!
{8348}{8372}Look!
{8484}{8521}How are you?
{8522}{8559}Good to see you.
{8705}{8775}What's that?
{8776}{8835}Yes. Yeah,that.|Good one, man.
{8836}{8872}What's goin' on here?
{8873}{8910}Good to see you guys.
{8911}{8948}Good to see you.
{9027}{9063}Rabbis, how are you?
{9064}{9126}Nice meat.
{9139}{9176}Photo op.
{9177}{9207}L'chaim!
{9774}{9811}Yeah, baby.
{11298}{11360}Keep a close eye|on that Kreplachistan situation.
{11361}{11395}Yes, sir.
{11510}{11554}Jerry! Jerry!
{11555}{11592}Thankyou.
{11593}{11627}Thankyou very much.
{11628}{11677}If you justjoined us,|today's topic is...
{11678}{11759}''Myfather is evil, and he|wants to take overthe world.''
{11790}{11874}OK, let's meet Scott Evil.
{12015}{12079}Hi, Scott.|Nice to have you with us.
{12080}{12124}Tell us aboutyourfather.
{12125}{12236}My dad is the head of|a worldwide evil organization...
{12237}{12288}with aspirations|of world domination.
{12324}{12392}Pretty serious stuff.|Where is he now?
{12393}{12463}He's, like,|cryogenicallyfrozen...
{12464}{12504}orbiting the earth or something.
{12505}{12540}That's whatyou think.
{12541}{12603}We have a surpriseforyou.
{12604}{12675}Let's bring out|Scott'sfather Dr. Evil!
{12725}{12764}What?
{12831}{12889}General,|we've got a situation here.
{12967}{13004}What is it, Sergeant?
{13005}{13037}Hello, Scott.
{13038}{13092}Daddy's back.
{13093}{13196}How could you do this to me,|on national television?
{13197}{13261}Well,throw me|africkin' bone here, Scott.
{13262}{13317}Why'd you run out on me?
{13347}{13409}Because you're not quite|evil enough.
{13444}{13484}Well, it's true.
{13485}{13554}You're quasi-evil.
{13555}{13597}You're semi-evil.
{13598}{13646}You're the margarine of evil.
{13647}{13729}You're the Diet Coke of evil.
{13730}{13793}Just one calorie.|Not evil enough.
{13794}{13841}What are you,|some kind offreak?
{13842}{13895}-Shut up,you--|-OK, come on.
{13896}{13953}l'll kickyour...punk.
{13954}{13990}Bring it on, skanky--
{13991}{14030}All right, come on.
{14031}{14091}No one talks to my son|like that. lt's OK, Scott.
{14092}{14125}You mother--
{14369}{14453}You were born in your mother's--
{14500}{14563}l'm OK. All right.
{14564}{14631}You were born in your mother's--
{14632}{14661}l'll kill you both!
{14701}{14729}There you go!
{14730}{14761}Great!
{14762}{14799}l gotyour hood!
{14831}{14867}Settle down.
{14868}{14912}lt's OK.
{14913}{14967}lt's only a television show.|Calm down.
{14968}{15003}l'm all right. l'm easy.
{15003}{15032}-Everything OK?|-OK.
{15033}{15063}Getthis jerk out of here.
{15064}{15139}l'll give you--piece of--
{15229}{15264}He's biting me!
{15302}{15336}The...is biting me!
{15395}{15529}The world is mine,you--
{15847}{15887}You've got mail.
{15888}{15923}Hello, Basil.
{15924}{15981}Hello,Austin.|How was your honeymoon?
{15982}{16064}ltturns out|thatVanessa was afembot.
{16065}{16148}Yes. We knew all along, sadly.
{16149}{16249}Anyway, l have|a new assignmentforyou.
{16250}{16300}You're scheduledfor|a photo shoot...
{16301}{16373}and one of the models|worksfor Dr. Evil.
{16374}{16410}Groovy, baby!
{16411}{16475}Shaguar, ho!
{16688}{16728}Show me to the models, baby.
{16729}{16789}Letthe magic begin.
{16790}{16848}Who have we gottoday?
{16849}{16877}OK, great.
{16878}{16928}Austin Powers,|l've heard a lot aboutyou.
{16929}{16965}l'm Rebecca Romijn.
{16966}{17003}l don't believe|l've had the pleasure.
{17005}{17054}Well, of course|you haven't had...
{17055}{17104}the pleasure, Rebecca.
{17105}{17162}We just met, baby. Yeah.
{17228}{17307}Who are you, baby?
{17308}{17361}lvana.
{17362}{17415}lvana Humpalot.
{17416}{17455}Excuse me?
{17503}{17561}And l vanna toilet|made out of solid gold...
{17562}{17612}but it's just not|in the cards, is it?
{17651}{17700}You know...
{17701}{17744}OK, everyone, let's get started.
{17745}{17801}Yes, beautiful. Feeling it!
{17802}{17846}Let's get some smiles.|lt's all in here.
{17847}{17888}That's it. Yes!
{17889}{17929}Let's letthe inside out.
{17931}{17964}OK,you're an animal!
{17965}{18001}Yes,there we go.
{18001}{18032}You're a tiger!
{18033}{18064}You're Tony the Tiger!
{18065}{18107}You're grrreat!
{18108}{18147}Very good. Loving it.
{18148}{18183}Now you're a lemur.
{18184}{18233}Running as a pack.
{18234}{18271}We go left.
{18272}{18313}We go right.
{18314}{18349}There's a predator|out of the jungle.
{18350}{18384}What's going on?
{18385}{18421}Burrow!
{18422}{18468}That's right,you're a lemur.|That's all you've got.
{18469}{18526}You don't have sharpteeth|capable of biting.
{18527}{18588}Make an interconnected series|of tunnels like the Viet Cong.
{18589}{18618}And look.
{18619}{18671}l'm not even shooting you.|lt's crazy.
{18672}{18725}And l'm spent.
{18726}{18772}Right,that's a wrap, everyone.
{18773}{18816}Miss Humpalot.
{18817}{18857}Da, darling?
{18858}{18892}Shall we?
{18893}{18957}Give me moment, hmm?
{19228}{19285}Dr. Evil, several years ago...
{19286}{19370}we invested in a small|Seattle-based coffee company.
{19401}{19505}Today Starbucks offers|premium quality coffee...
{19506}{19557}at affordable prices.
{19558}{19614}De-lish!
{19686}{19735}If we shift our resources...
{19736}{19840}awayfrom evil empires|and towards Starbucks...
{19841}{19906}we can increase|our profitsfive-fold.
{19907}{20010}NumberTwo,|l make the decisions here, OK?
{20011}{20055}l demand a little respect.
{20056}{20134}Dr. Evil,|you have a little of the...
{20135}{20185}Silence!
{20186}{20269}l will nottolerate|your insolence!
{20270}{20345}Frau Farbissina,|wie geht es ihnen?
{20346}{20395}Sehr gut, Herr Doktor.
{20395}{20432}How are things?
{20433}{20532}l have come to embrace the love|that dare not speak its name.
{20533}{20576}To my right is my lover.
{20577}{20633}We met atthe LPGA Tour.
{20634}{20699}Her name is Unibrau.
{20732}{20762}Right on.
{20800}{20845}Welcome, Unibrau.
{20932}{20960}What?
{20961}{21032}A little milk...nose...mustache.
{21074}{21138}l know.
{21139}{21170}Meantto.
{21171}{21234}That's how we drink it|in Belgium.
{21235}{21273}Called a Belgian dip.
{21303}{21359}While you werefrozen...
{21360}{21435}we began a program to clone you.
{21436}{21474}Cool.
{21475}{21534}Send in the clone!
{21535}{21627}He is exactly like you|in every way.
{21701}{21787}Except one eighth your size.
{21814}{21858}Breathtaking.
{21859}{21935}l shall call him...
{21936}{21984}Mini-Me.
{22106}{22156}Your stock is rising,|NumberTwo.
{22238}{22279}Come, Mr. Bigglesworth.
{22340}{22402}Mini-Me, are you hungry?
{22403}{22442}Something to eat?
{22443}{22473}Not even a Hot Pocket?
{22509}{22544}An Eggo?
{22545}{22634}No,we don't gnaw on our kitty.
{22635}{22725}Leave Mini-Mr. Bigglesworth|alone.
{22726}{22779}Just love him and stroke him.
{22826}{22863}As you know...
{22864}{22938}every diabolical scheme|that l have hatched...
{22939}{23010}has been thwarted|by Austin Powers.
{23011}{23063}And why is that,|ladies and gentlemen?
{23064}{23112}'Cause you never kill him|when you getthe chance to...
{23113}{23149}and you're a big dope.
{23333}{23391}Down, Mini-Me.
{23421}{23535}Austin Powers always defeats me|because he has mojo.
{23536}{23571}Mojo?
{23611}{23669}The libido. The lifeforce.
{23670}{23724}The essence. The right stuff.
{23725}{23790}Whatthe French call|a certain...
{23791}{23843}l don't know what.
{23844}{23895}Ladies and gentlemen...
{23896}{23960}l've developed a device|fortraveling through time...
{23962}{24046}which l call a ''time machine.''
{24047}{24124}Using this ''time machine...''
{24125}{24235}l'm going backto the Sixties|and steal Austin Powers' mojo.
{24236}{24285}If you have a time machine...
{24286}{24335}why notjust go back|and kill Austin Powers...
{24336}{24378}when he's sitting|on the crapper or something?
{24379}{24459}How about no, Scott?
{24460}{24490}OK?
{24491}{24579}Why not use your knowledge|of thefuture...
{24580}{24620}to play the stock market?
{24621}{24658}We could make trillions.
{24659}{24762}Why make trillions|when we could make...
{24763}{24806}billions?
{24848}{24912}A trillion is more|than a billion, numnuts.
{24913}{24958}All right, zip it.
{24959}{25006}-You can't even--|-Zip it.
{25007}{25045}Zi-i-i-p.
{25046}{25079}Look, all l'm--
{25080}{25124}Ladies and gentlemen|of the jury, ex-zip-it ''A.''
{25125}{25167}NumberTwo,|would you please back me up?
{25168}{25241}-Look, l'm Zippi Longstocking.|-l can't--
{25242}{25283}When a problem comes along
{25284}{25324}You must zip it
{25325}{25361}Zip it good.
{25362}{25400}Frau,would you please--
{25480}{25529}Subtitle: ''Zip it.''
{25530}{25561}-l'm justtrying to--|-Zip.
{25562}{25625}Would you like to have|a suckle of my zipple?
{25626}{25676}-l wantyou--Stop--|-Zip.
{25701}{25768}Listen--All--You know--
{25769}{25813}You're like a child--
{25814}{25895}Talk in--If you--|Just--One time--
{25896}{25966}Zip it.|Unveil the time portal.
{26233}{26281}As you know...
{26282}{26379}Austin Powers|wasfrozen in 1967.
{26380}{26460}Therefore,|l will travel to 1969...
{26461}{26528}two years after he wasfrozen.
{26529}{26566}He'll be helpless.
{26567}{26603}Ladies and gentlemen...
{26604}{26638}l'm aboutto travel|through time.
{26639}{26681}l bid you adieu.
{26859}{26920}l'm OK.
{26949}{26998}Notturned on, l suppose.
{27022}{27085}Do you thinkyou could...
{27086}{27117}Yeah,thanks.
{27118}{27170}Come, Mini-Me!
{27271}{27331}Don't be scared, Mini-Me.
{27659}{27718}Welcome to 1969.
{27719}{27780}Thankyou, NumberTwo.
{27781}{27847}You look so healthy|and youthful.
{27848}{27881}Well,thankyou.
{27882}{27911}Herr Doktor.
{27912}{27998}And Frau,you look so...
{28074}{28146}Right.
{28147}{28220}l received your memo|from thefuture.
{28221}{28276}Your new lair is up and running.
{28277}{28349}ls it a hollowed-outvolcano|like l askedfor?
{28368}{28402}Of course.
{28429}{28479}Good.
{28479}{28568}Then it's all going|perfectly to plan.
{29262}{29324}Yeah, baby,yeah!
{29440}{29509}When did you getthe Clapper?
{29510}{29562}November 1964.
{29563}{29615}Dutch East lndies. Shore leave.
{29616}{29691}Do you know how we keepwarm|in Russia?
{29729}{29773}l can guess, baby.
{29774}{29804}We play chess.
{29805}{29859}l guessed wrong.
{29860}{29970}lttakes a keen intellect|to play chess.
{29971}{30049}l assume you know how to play.
{30126}{30158}Of course, baby.
{30666}{30737}Whatto do,whatto do.
{31496}{31559}Let me askyou a question.
{31560}{31610}And be honest.
{31611}{31669}Do l make you horny, baby?
{31670}{31713}Do l?
{31714}{31779}Do l make you randy?
{31854}{31908}No more games.
{31909}{31971}Dr. Evil sent me here|to kill you...
{31972}{32038}but lfind you so...
{32039}{32086}sexy and...
{32124}{32186}Just make love to me.
{32186}{32237}Now,Austin Powerovich.
{32238}{32276}Hurry!
{32374}{32451}You're hairy like animal!
{32453}{32526}Grr, baby! Very grr!
{32527}{32591}Make love to me, monkey man.
{32619}{32683}Dr. Evil, l don't understand...
{32684}{32761}how we can hope to steal|Austin Powers' mojo.
{32762}{32804}We've tried this before.
{32837}{32902}The security around Powers|isfoolproof.
{32903}{32959}Butthis time|we have an operative...
{32960}{33022}inside the Ministry of Defense.
{33023}{33053}Really?
{33054}{33111}Yes, really.
{33161}{33264}He's stealing Austin Powers'|mojo even as we speak.
{33265}{33297}Really?
{33426}{33475}He's a disgruntled|Scottish guard...
{33476}{33562}knownfor his lethal temper|and his unusual eating habits.
{33564}{33610}He weighs a metric ton.
{33611}{33686}His name...Fat Bastard.
{33750}{33852}We've had reports there's a spy|in the Ministry of Defense.
{33853}{33923}The contents of this room|are vital to the country.
{33924}{33987}Be on special alert.
{33988}{34021}Yes, sir.
{34022}{34123}And try to lose some weight,|for God's sake.
{34238}{34319}Mr. English colonel|tellin' me to lose weight.
{34320}{34405}l'm a hard case, he says.
{34406}{34454}Well, listen up, sonny Jim...
{34455}{34531}l ate a baby!
{34532}{34634}Oh, aye, baby.|The other otherwhite meat.
{34636}{34721}Baby: lt's what'sfor dinner.
{35329}{35417}l've gotyour mojo now,|sonny Jim.
{35474}{35519}What's wrong?
{35520}{35565}Crikey!
{35566}{35630}l've lost my mojo.
{35737}{35786}Austin,|the test results confirm...
{35787}{35836}thatyou've lostyour mojo...
{35837}{35898}and it couldn't come|at a worse time.
{35899}{36001}We have evidence that Dr. Evil|has developed a time machine...
{36002}{36078}and has traveled back|to the year 1969.
{36079}{36109}Luckily,we,too...
{36110}{36158}have developed|a time travel device...
{36159}{36224}to transportyou|backto the Sixties.
{36252}{36361}This is where you|inputyour destination.
{36362}{36397}Wait a tick.
{36398}{36499}Basil, if l travel backto 1969|and l wasfrozen in 1967...
{36500}{36562}presumably, l could go visit|myfrozen seIf.
{36562}{36624}But if l'm stillfrozen|in 1967...
{36625}{36662}how could l have been|unthawed...
{36663}{36699}in the Nineties|and traveled back--
{36700}{36758}Oh, no, l've gone cross-eyed.
{36758}{36819}l suggestyou don'tworry|aboutthis sort of thing...
{36820}{36860}and just enjoy yourseIf.
{36861}{36917}That goesforyou all,too.
{36965}{36998}This is smashing, Basil.
{36999}{37085}l go backto the Sixties,|recharge my mojo...
{37086}{37168}defeat Dr. Evil,|and be back in timefortea.
{37169}{37255}Swinging Sixties,|here l come, baby,yeah!
{37256}{37296}Move! Move!
{37428}{37465}Sorry.
{37466}{37502}l betthat's expensive.
{37626}{37655}Sorry.
{37656}{37703}Easy!
{37704}{37740}Stop it now,Austin!
{37741}{37812}Here we go.
{37813}{37874}Yeah, baby,yeah!
{37904}{37961}Godspeed,Austin Powers.
{38427}{38482}l'm home!
{38856}{38931}l'm back in the Sixties,|baby,yeah!
{39459}{39542}Getyour hands|off my Heine, baby.
{40037}{40077}Who are you today, baby?
{40078}{40167}My name is Robin Swallows.
{40168}{40239}Swallows.|That's an interesting name.
{40239}{40306}Maiden name's Spitz.
{40307}{40377}Which is it, baby,|Spitz or Swallows?
{41592}{41635}Those are skintight.
{41636}{41700}How do you get|into those pants, baby?
{41701}{41757}You can start|by buying me a drink.
{42035}{42095}l want! l want!
{42559}{42647}Better play it cool.|Yourfriend worksfor Dr. Evil.
{42648}{42753}And justwho|do you workfor, baby?
{42821}{42883}Tell me, Mr. Powers...
{42884}{42925}do you swing?
{42926}{42964}Are you kidding, baby?
{42966}{43040}l putthe ''Grr!'' in ''swinger,''|baby!
{43081}{43143}Then why don'tyou come right...
{43144}{43222}over here.
{43223}{43265}l can do that.
{43609}{43673}Prepare to die, Powers!
{43716}{43772}Use the machine gun!
{43995}{44061}Say good-bye, Powers!
{44103}{44174}Use the bazooka!
{44468}{44545}Thefall will kill us both,|Powers!
{44786}{44860}You can'twin, Powers.
{44912}{44974}Why won'tyou die?
{45104}{45139}Carefor a ride?
{45236}{45298}Go!
{45426}{45489}Austin Powers, l presume.
{45491}{45582}Powers by name,|Powers by reputation.
{45613}{45656}Felicity Shagwell, ClA.
{45657}{45694}Shagwell by name...
{45695}{45768}shag-very-well by reputation.
{45769}{45837}Oh, behave!
{45838}{45875}Not if l can help it.
{46200}{46274}You know what's remarkable|is how much England...
{46275}{46363}looks in no way|like Southern California.
{46782}{46813}Crikey!
{46814}{46889}We've got company! Looks like|one of Dr. Evil's assassins.
{47449}{47498}Steady now.
{47499}{47534}Hands up!
{47535}{47647}Do you remember me,|Austin Powers?
{47648}{47723}l don't recall your name|butyour...
{47724}{47787}fez isfamiliar.
{47885}{47953}My name is Mustafa.
{47954}{48027}And l'm the man|who will be killing you now.
{48028}{48139}Daktari!
{48354}{48390}Who sentyou?
{48391}{48422}You'll have to kill me.
{48423}{48460}Who sentyou?
{48461}{48509}Kiss my ass, Powers.
{48509}{48545}Who sentyou?
{48546}{48581}Dr. Evil.
{48631}{48692}-Thatwas easy.|-Thatwas.
{48693}{48737}Why did you tell us?
{48738}{48793}l can't stand to be asked|the same question three times.
{48794}{48830}ltjust irritates me.
{48831}{48892}Where is Dr. Evil hiding?
{48893}{48923}Why would he tell me?
{48924}{48969}l'm just one of his|low-levelfunctionaries.
{48970}{49016}Where is Dr. Evil hiding?
{49017}{49067}You'll have to torture me.|l'll nevertell you.
{49068}{49143}-Where is Dr. Evil hiding?|-Damn! Three times.
{49144}{49237}He's hiding|in the secretvolcano lair.
{49238}{49319}Where's Dr. Evil's|secretvolcano lair?
{49346}{49383}l spit atthe question.
{49384}{49459}Do l really have to askyou|two more times?
{49460}{49500}Go to hell, Powers!
{49501}{49680}Fine. Where is Dr. Evil's|secretvolcano lair?
{49681}{49756}l will take it|to the grave with me.
{49757}{49808}You have to answer.|He asked you three times.
{49861}{49901}The second question was...
{49902}{49961}''Do l really have to askyou|two more times?''
{49962}{50048}Thatwould be thefirst question|in a new line of questioning...
{50048}{50112}and wouldn't count in|the other line of questioning.
{50113}{50148}He's right.
{50149}{50200}However, l'm justtrying to|get informationfrom you, man.
{50201}{50292}l don't need any consistency|in the questions, do l?
{50293}{50346}No. You're preaching|to the converted--
{50371}{50410}If l'm preaching|to the converted...
{50411}{50445}then why are you|being so slavish...
{50445}{50500}to the three-questionform?
{50501}{50538}You're not even|looking at me, man.
{50539}{50581}Now you're just being rude,|you know what l mean?
{50582}{50614}You're not listening, man.
{50727}{50790}Oh, crikey!
{50878}{50963}Well,Austin, l thinkthis time|you havefinally metyour match.
{50964}{51001}Oh, no, baby.
{51002}{51092}l've beaten Dr. Evil before,|and l'll beat him again.
{51093}{51145}l was talking about me.
{51341}{51378}Hello upthere!
{51379}{51435}l seem to havefallen|down a cliff.
{51436}{51506}l'm still alive,|but l'm very badly injured.
{51507}{51594}l think my legs are broken.|l'll try to stand.
{51619}{51660}Yes,they are broken.
{51661}{51710}Perhaps you could|toss me a band-aid...
{51711}{51760}or some antibacterial cream.
{51761}{51860}l'm in an extraordinarily|large amount of pain.
{51861}{51914}The bone has|gone through the skin.
{51915}{51969}lfear it might be gangrenous.
{51970}{52035}The wound is beginning to smell|a little like almonds...
{52036}{52085}which is not good.
{52086}{52127}Please?
{52128}{52156}No one?
{52157}{52185}Sorry.
{52186}{52224}l'll try the other leg.
{52353}{52411}Two of my assassins are dead.
{52412}{52484}l will nottoleratefailure.
{52485}{52533}l'm the man who will|maintain the dignity...
{52533}{52583}of this evil organization.
{52583}{52644}Whatthe hell was that?
{52645}{52707}Volcanic eruption!
{52934}{53045}May l presentto you my spy|in the Ministry of Defense...
{53046}{53127}Fat Bastard.
{53128}{53172}Firstthingsfirst!
{53173}{53222}Where's your shitter?
{53223}{53302}l've got a turtle head|poking out.
{53338}{53376}Charming.
{53377}{53423}l'm not kidding.
{53423}{53515}l got a crap on deck|that could choke a donkey.
{53516}{53590}lt's squidgey!
{53591}{53712}Christ, l'm getting|all emotionalfrom it,you know?
{53713}{53775}Right.
{53776}{53873}Fat Bastard,|could l have my mojo, please?
{53874}{53923}Where's my money?
{53924}{53982}All right, give him his money.
{54040}{54126}Jesus Christ, he's tiny!
{54127}{54227}l've had bigger chunks of corn|in my crap.
{54260}{54318}Wait a minute.
{54319}{54396}He kinda looks like a baby.
{54397}{54473}Come here! l'm gonna eatyou!
{54474}{54510}l'm biggerthan you.
{54511}{54554}l'm higher on thefood chain.
{54555}{54610}Get in my belly!
{54611}{54678}Come on!
{54679}{54737}You're lucky,wee man!
{54762}{54812}Can l have a hug?
{54879}{54955}Let me make you a deal,|all right?
{54956}{55018}You getthe mojo,|you keepyour money...
{55018}{55077}and l'll getyour baby.
{55121}{55208}Right.
{55209}{55246}l want my baby back, baby back
{55247}{55293}Baby back, baby back,|baby back ribs
{55294}{55335}l want my baby back, baby back
{55336}{55397}Baby back, baby back,|baby back ribs
{55398}{55436}Excuse me.
{55437}{55485}Chili
{55486}{55537}Baby back ribs
{55538}{55625}Dr. Evil,what are we|going to do about Powers?
{55626}{55717}Austin Powers|is no longer a threatto me.
{55718}{55777}l have his mojo.
{56701}{56796}All right, everyone,|you're dismissed.
{56797}{56845}Private time.
{57646}{57739}Dr. Evil, l don'twantthis|to interfere with ourwork.
{57740}{57784}Don'tworry, mama.
{57785}{57860}Things won't getweird.
{58067}{58107}Onefor me...
{58171}{58220}and onefor my homies.
{58267}{58314}Herr Doktor.
{59085}{59136}So what happened here?
{59138}{59187}Apparently a rogue agent|named Fat Bastard...
{59188}{59224}infiltrated the unit...
{59225}{59271}assigned to guard|your cryogenic chamber.
{59272}{59308}He used some sort of nerve gas.
{59309}{59348}These men don't|remember a thing.
{59349}{59386}Captain,why don'tyou...
{59387}{59428}cross-check|Fat Bastard's profile...
{59429}{59482}with the mainframe at Langley?
{59483}{59511}Yes, ma'am.
{59512}{59560}Can l borrow that, please?|Thankyou.
{59604}{59687}Look at me.|l'm a sexy bitch, baby. Yeah!
{59688}{59730}You're a Popsicle,yes.
{59786}{59846}And l'm spent.
{59847}{59907}Let's go, baby,yeah!
{60020}{60056}Hey there. How are you?
{60376}{60409}Come on, Felicity.
{61175}{61212}Yeah, babe.
{61262}{61299}Shall we sit down?
{61325}{61361}This is great.
{61362}{61395}Groovy!
{61425}{61524}So,Austin,|what's thefuture like?
{61525}{61599}Well,|everyone has aflying car...
{61600}{61660}entire meals|come in pillform...
{61661}{61763}and the Earth is ruled|by damned dirty apes!
{61764}{61802}Oh, my God!
{61803}{61851}Had youfor a second.
{61884}{61948}You can have mefor even longer,|if you want.
{61949}{62073}You're one groovy baby...
{62074}{62115}baby.
{62157}{62194}Too many ''babies.''
{62232}{62295}Don'tyou dare move.
{62357}{62423}Ladies and gentlemen,|Mr. Burt Bacharach...
{62424}{62495}and Mr. Elvis Costello.
{62596}{62685}What do you get|when youfall in love?
{62686}{62760}A guy with a pin|to burstyour bubble
{62761}{62795}Would you care to dance?
{62796}{62833}l'd love to.
{62834}{62883}For all yourtrouble
{62884}{62933}l'll
{62934}{63084}Neverfall in love again
{63085}{63209}l'll neverfall in love again
{63210}{63328}Don'ttell me|what it's all about
{63329}{63430}'Cause l've been there|and l'm glad l'm out
{63431}{63532}Out of the those chains,|those chains that bind you
{63534}{63633}That is why|l'm here to remind you
{63634}{63710}What do you get|when youfall in love?
{63711}{63820}You only get lies|and pain and sorrow
{63821}{63914}Sofor at least until tomorrow
{63915}{63968}l'll
{63969}{64086}Neverfall in love again
{64087}{64143}l'll
{64144}{64220}Neverfall in love
{64221}{64252}Again
{64253}{64317}You're quite good on yourfeet.
{64318}{64385}l'm even better off myfeet.
{64707}{64764}Oh, behave, baby.
{64935}{64984}-Hi.|-Hi there.
{65036}{65067}How are things?
{65068}{65115}Good, Herr Doktor. And you?
{65116}{65186}Great.
{65187}{65259}Justtaking a break?
{65260}{65346}Try the Hot Pockets.|They're breathtaking.
{65422}{65459}lt gotweird, didn't it?
{65460}{65535}-Ja.|-l knew it.
{65536}{65577}You haven't called.
{65578}{65611}We talked aboutthis.
{65612}{65689}We promised each other|itwouldn't getweird.
{65690}{65733}l can't let myfeelings|foryou interfere...
{65734}{65815}with my taking overthe world,|you know that.
{65816}{65900}You know,|l will never love another man.
{65946}{65986}Yes,that's true.
{66073}{66137}Dr. Evil, l'm late.
{66138}{66175}No,you got here right on time.
{66175}{66312}No, l mean ''l'm late.''
{66467}{66498}Dad.
{66567}{66633}Hey there, sport.
{66634}{66668}What are you doing here?
{66669}{66768}l was justthinking that maybe|we could work all this out.
{66769}{66840}After all,you are myfather.
{66841}{66944}Scott,you had your chance, OK?
{66945}{67012}l already had someone|created in my image.
{67013}{67067}He's evil, he wants|to take overthe world...
{67068}{67154}and hefits easily|into most overhead storage bins.
{67156}{67199}Him?
{67200}{67235}Look at him, he's crazy.
{67236}{67323}He's like a vicious|little Chihuahua thing.
{67359}{67414}He'll kill me|thefirst chance he gets.
{67415}{67450}Probably.
{67480}{67512}l love you.
{67761}{67857}l am a sexy bitch. Yes.
{67858}{67950}Felicity,|make yourseIf at home, baby.
{67951}{68006}What do you think of|my shag pad, darling?
{68007}{68075}lt's amazing,Austin.
{68168}{68217}Wait a tick.
{68352}{68471}That's how my mojo was stolen.|Fat Bastard.
{68472}{68530}She's a professional agent.
{68531}{68608}She's not interested|in shagging!
{68609}{68643}Please, God.
{68644}{68695}Spectacles,testicles,|wallet, and watch.
{68696}{68764}Austin, l'm waiting.
{68918}{69005}How about one of|yourworld-famous massages?
{69007}{69118}You mean a sensual massage?
{69119}{69182}Right,then.
{69183}{69276}OK, here we go. Yes.
{69417}{69493}Wait a minute,|something's itching me.
{69520}{69559}That's better.
{69560}{69596}Crikey.
{69799}{69855}How does thatfeel, baby?
{69856}{69901}Lower.
{69902}{69979}How does thatfeel, baby?
{70004}{70028}What?
{70029}{70072}You don't have to be cute|with me.
{70073}{70110}We're way pastthat.
{70111}{70158}We are?
{70159}{70228}What do you think?
{70229}{70321}Listen, Felicity...
{70322}{70370}l'm sorry.
{70371}{70433}l can't do this.
{70467}{70504}l have to go.
{70607}{70638}ls it me?
{70639}{70744}l can't explain.
{71024}{71054}Hello,Agent Shagwell.
{71055}{71095}Where's Austin?
{71096}{71175}l must've said something wrong,|so he just left all of a sudden.
{71176}{71300}Listen, l don'twantyou|getting too close to Austin.
{71301}{71361}lt's not meantto be.
{71362}{71406}l don't gettoo close|to anybody, Basil.
{71407}{71458}My interest in this case|is purely professional.
{71459}{71497}Good.
{71498}{71570}Then you won't mind tracking|down Fat Bastard tonight.
{71571}{71600}No problem.
{71601}{71663}We need you to plant|this homing device on him...
{71664}{71717}by any means necessary.
{71718}{71750}No problem.
{71751}{71802}Keep upthe good work.
{71803}{71878}Remember,|by any means necessary.
{72333}{72375}Look atyourseIf.
{72376}{72463}You used to be so virile.
{72464}{72544}You were a swinger, man.
{72545}{72643}And now you're nothing.
{72643}{72743}But at least|it can't get any worse.
{72744}{72808}Well, surprise, surprise, huh!
{72809}{72873}Look atthat meal.
{72875}{72990}l'm dead sexy.|Look at my sexy body.
{73021}{73072}Oh, look, l'm like a singer.
{73073}{73159}Oh, sexy man, sexy man
{73160}{73239}Eating like a sexy man can
{73240}{73308}By the way,|would you like some chicken?
{73309}{73337}l've got more.
{73338}{73392}No,thanks.
{73393}{73432}What have we got here?
{73433}{73545}Done with that.|All right,that's done.
{73741}{73844}Remember,|by any means necessary.
{73951}{74011}Frisky, are we?
{74012}{74046}Give it up!
{74072}{74114}Ladies and gentlemen...
{74115}{74205}we're aboutto begin phase two|of our evil project...
{74206}{74279}or is it phase--|l don't know phases.
{74280}{74323}Anyways,this is the phase...
{74324}{74438}in which we put|a giant ''laser'' on the moon.
{74439}{74535}As you know,the moon rotates|around the Earth, like so.
{74696}{74737}When the moon reaches...
{74738}{74807}its appropriate|lunar alignment...
{74808}{74873}itwill destroy|Washington D.C.
{74874}{74934}You see, l've turned the moon...
{74935}{75053}into what l like to call|a ''Death Star.''
{75096}{75168}-What?|-Nothing, Darth.
{75169}{75201}What did you call me?
{75202}{75260}Nothing. Rip-off!
{75294}{75329}Bless you.
{75330}{75405}Anyways,the key to this plan|is the giant laser.
{75406}{75506}ltwas invented by the noted|Cambridge physicist Dr. Parsons.
{75507}{75626}Therefore,we shall call it|the Alan Parsons Project.
{75627}{75695}Oh, my God.
{75696}{75728}What now?
{75729}{75829}The Alan Parsons Project is a|progressive rock band in 1982.
{75830}{75927}Why don'tyou just call it|''Operation Wang Chung,'' ass?
{75928}{75966}What should we--
{75967}{76033}l'm sure ''Operation Bananarama''|will be huge.
{76034}{76058}What are you saying?
{76059}{76108}-If you wanted--|-Shh!
{76109}{76139}Trying to be hip--
{76140}{76209}''WWW.shh.com.org.''
{76210}{76260}-You're so--|-Shh!
{76261}{76347}If we could put aside|thefamily squabbling...
{76348}{76434}l thinkwe could get down|to some serious business here.
{76435}{76476}-Really?|-Yeah.
{76477}{76524}l don't like that insolenttone.
{76525}{76606}-l meant nothing by it.|-You wantto run things?
{76607}{76635}No, not at all.
{76636}{76693}You wantto be Daddy,|is that it?
{76694}{76763}NumberTwo,you wantto wear|the Daddy pants?
{76764}{76806}You gonna cry?
{76807}{76886}You gonna cry?
{76887}{76921}What are you doing?
{76922}{76992}Are you gonna squirt some?|You gonna cry?
{76993}{77064}See,you were gonna cry.|You're a big man now, huh?
{77065}{77107}Yeah,thought so.
{77727}{77788}Aboutwhat happened last night--
{77789}{77829}You don't have to explain.
{77862}{77914}You don't understand.|You see...
{77964}{78024}l've lost my mojo.
{78025}{78100}Oh, so that's why you--
{78181}{78226}l thoughtyou didn't like me.
{78227}{78298}Oh, no, baby.|You're very shagadelic.
{78299}{78351}l just didn'twant|tofall in love again...
{78353}{78438}and l thoughtyou'd never|love me without my mojo.
{78438}{78470}lt's notyou.
{78471}{78613}You'refab, switched on,|a bit of all right. Yes!
{78614}{78666}That is so great.
{78667}{78714}There's something|l should tell you,too.
{78715}{78791}Last night, l planted|a homing device on Fat Bastard.
{78792}{78826}Smashing, baby.
{78827}{78868}Then we can track down|Fat Bastard...
{78869}{78910}get my mojo,|go backto my place...
{78911}{79001}hop on the goodfoot|and do the bad thing. Yes!
{79002}{79030}Butthere's more.
{79031}{79094}ln orderto get close|to Fat Bastard, l had to--
{79095}{79159}Hello, hello.|The signal's coming through.
{79160}{79197}He's at Paddington Station.
{79198}{79235}Let's go!
{79304}{79357}-We're close, baby.|-This way.
{79358}{79418}Straight--no, no, left.|Through here.
{79496}{79523}We've got him.
{79524}{79565}Private, bring upthe ram.
{79700}{79736}Go, go, go!
{79736}{79774}Where is he?
{79803}{79851}Oh, my God!
{79852}{79922}Fat Bastard left afloater!
{79923}{79980}ln the name|of all things sacred...
{79981}{80056}that is the most|foul-smelling thing ever!
{80057}{80103}Somebodyflush it down!
{80103}{80135}No, nobody touch anything.
{80136}{80208}We have to getthe sample|to the labto be analyzed.
{80252}{80293}l'm gonna give.
{80509}{80543}Austin,there you are.
{80544}{80576}Has the sample been analyzed?
{80577}{80664}Cor, baby.|You lookvery shagadelic!
{80717}{80787}But do we really have|to be here, Felicity?
{80787}{80849}l mean, it's so boring.
{80850}{80892}l don't believe in science.
{80893}{81025}When it comes to the spy game,|to me, it's all instinct.
{81142}{81200}-Hello, everybody.|-Hello, Basil.
{81201}{81249}The results are in.
{81250}{81327}We've discovered trace elements|of a rare vegetable...
{81328}{81425}found only on one island,|here, in the Caribbean.
{81465}{81530}What does it all mean, Basil?
{81531}{81642}lt means thatthis is|the location of Dr. Evil's lair.
{81643}{81710}Smashing, Basil.
{81711}{81821}Cor!|This coffee smells like shit.
{81888}{81940}lt is shit,Austin.
{81941}{82014}Oh, good,then it's notjust me.
{82125}{82179}lt's a bit nutty.
{82437}{82478}Excuse me, Dr. Evil.
{82479}{82556}l have to speakto you|aboutthis Mini-Me.
{82557}{82593}He's notfitting in?
{82593}{82675}ls he giving off too much|of a creepy Oompa Loompa vibe?
{82676}{82748}No, it's justthat he bites.
{82817}{82854}He's a biter.
{82935}{82990}What's wrong, Mini-Me?
{82991}{83038}Something you wantto tell us?
{83080}{83107}Teething.
{83156}{83248}Get me the president|of the United States of America!
{83249}{83297}Oh, he's on.
{83297}{83358}What do you want, Dr. Evil?
{83359}{83411}Mr. President,|in twelve hours...
{83412}{83558}l will destroy Washington D.C.|with this giant ''laser.''
{83559}{83619}Whatthe--?
{83619}{83734}Mini-Me, stop humping the laser.
{83735}{83780}OK, honestto God...
{83781}{83908}why don'tyou and the giant|laser get africkin' room?
{83909}{84006}Mr. President, after|l destroy Washington D.C...
{84007}{84101}l will destroy another major|city every hour on the hour.
{84102}{84162}That is, unless, of course,|you pay me...
{84192}{84296}one hundred billion dollars.
{84419}{84483}Dr. Evil,this is 1969.
{84484}{84548}That amount of money|doesn't even exist.
{84594}{84684}That's like saying, ''l want|a kajillion bajillion dollars.''
{84731}{84841}Come on, Mr. President,|show me the money.
{84842}{84875}Show you what money?
{84876}{84948}Show me the money,|show me the money.
{84949}{85032}You had me at hello.|Tear. Nothing? No?
{85033}{85106}Psst! lt's 1969.
{85107}{85197}''Jerry Maguire'' won't come out|for anotherthirty years.
{85198}{85271}Nobody knows what|you're talking about, ass.
{85272}{85366}Scott, Daddy's working, OK?
{85367}{85409}And when you're|in the main chamber...
{85410}{85471}try and use|the big boy voice, OK?
{85472}{85505}Thankyou.
{85541}{85610}Mr. President,|allow me to demonstrate...
{85611}{85696}the awesome lethality|of the Alan Parsons Project.
{85697}{85747}Fire the laser!
{85891}{85946}Damage report! Damage report!
{85947}{86027}lt's OK.|lt's all right. Come on.
{86057}{86134}Actually,thatwasfootage|from ''lndependence Day...''
{86135}{86187}butthe real laser|would be a lot like that.
{86188}{86242}Yeah, scary.
{86287}{86318}Now, Dr. Evil--
{86319}{86419}Talkto the hand, 'cause|theface don'twantto hear it.
{86421}{86475}What hand? Talkto your hand?
{86476}{86551}You ain't all that|and a bag of potato chips.
{86552}{86592}What are you talking about?
{86593}{86667}Don't go there, girIfriend.
{86694}{86741}Whose girIfriend?
{86742}{86796}Don't mess with me,|l'm one crazy mo-fo.
{86797}{86833}l had to pop a cop...
{86834}{86898}'cause he wasn't giving me|my props in Oaktown.
{86899}{86959}No? l heard that somewhere.
{86988}{87038}You're an idiot.
{87040}{87149}Mr. President, l think|we have an understanding.
{87194}{87294}Dr. Evil,what are our plans|regarding Austin Powers?
{87295}{87388}Austin Powers?|He's the snake to my mongoose.
{87389}{87534}Orthe mongoose to my snake.|Eitherway, it's bad.
{87535}{87571}l don't know animals.
{87572}{87637}But l do know this--
{87638}{87708}This time it's personal.
{87709}{87753}Kill him.
{87890}{87955}There's Dr. Evil's island.
{88811}{88840}Let's set up camp.
{88841}{88876}Be careful with that bag!
{88877}{88930}There's explosives in it.
{88956}{89015}This could be dangerous.
{89261}{89354}What if God was one of us?
{89380}{89477}Just a slob like one of us
{89816}{89848}Well done,very good.
{89849}{89929}Dr. Evil,thatwasfantastic.
{89930}{89974}Thankyou, NumberTwo.
{89975}{90012}l wrote that,yeah.
{90013}{90080}Dad, he putthis in my bed.
{90081}{90111}Who?
{90112}{90162}Your stupid mini-you.
{90163}{90221}He put road kill in my sheets!
{90244}{90329}What--Mini-Me,|don'tyou ever do that again.
{90330}{90420}You hear me,|don'tyou ever do that again!
{90421}{90478}l can't stay mad atyou.
{90479}{90521}Look atthat punum.
{90552}{90664}Dr. Evil's headquarters|is right overthat next ridge.
{90665}{90694}Let me look.
{90722}{90770}Damn it. How do we get in?
{90771}{90849}Hello, Mummy.|Can l have some chocolates?
{90850}{90913}l want some Mars Bars.
{90914}{90957}Don't smack my bottom, Mummy.
{90984}{91029}Sorry, love.
{91030}{91104}l got stuck|in your dirty pillows.
{91104}{91141}Let's look atthe map.
{91224}{91264}Austin,what's our plan?
{91265}{91300}According to this map...
{91300}{91393}the entire island is crawling|with Dr. Evil's guards.
{91394}{91453}l wantto make sure|the explosives didn't getwet...
{91454}{91482}but l can'tfind them.
{91483}{91533}Look in the bottom.
{91534}{91602}OK, l'll dig a little deeper.
{91603}{91656}Wow,this bag is reallyfull.
{91693}{91737}Just keep digging, darling.
{91738}{91792}l'll justfeel aroundforthem.
{91854}{91910}Good lord,Austin.
{91911}{91959}What do you keep in here?
{91959}{92051}Anything that catches|myfancy,you know.
{92052}{92077}Give it a good tug.
{92115}{92165}Do we really need this?
{92166}{92239}l'll askyou notto open that|inside,thankyou very much.
{92240}{92302}Oh, my God.
{92303}{92354}Oops, itwent off.
{92355}{92423}Yes, it does that|from time to time.
{92424}{92468}Eww. Yuck.
{92469}{92519}Yeah,that's nasty.
{92520}{92563}Yeah, sorry aboutthat.
{92588}{92619}Smelly.
{92620}{92682}These people make me sick.
{92684}{92718}Can you snap me a beer?
{92837}{92866}What is it?
{92867}{92898}lt's a gerbil.
{92899}{92937}How did that get in your bag?
{92979}{93038}l don't know.
{93103}{93193}Dr. Evil,we have a problem.
{93194}{93243}Austin Powers is on the island.
{93244}{93339}Bring him to me...alive.
{93340}{93396}You.
{93399}{93437}Hit it!
{93438}{93519}This is|a very sensitive subject.
{93670}{93804}Justthe two of us
{93856}{93923}Justthe two of us
{93924}{93986}From the moment l heard|Frau say l had a clone
{93986}{94050}l knew that l'd be safe|'cause l'd never be alone
{94051}{94117}An evil doctor shouldn't|speak aloud about hisfeelings
{94118}{94177}My hurt and my pain|don't make me too appealin'
{94178}{94241}l'd hoped Scott|would look upto me
{94242}{94312}Run the business of thefamily
{94313}{94368}Head an evil empire|just like his dear old dad
{94369}{94433}Give him my love|and the things l never had
{94434}{94490}Scottwould think|l was a cool guy
{94491}{94559}Return the love l have,|make me wantto cry
{94560}{94624}Be evil,|but have myfeelings,too
{94625}{94684}Change my life with|Oprah and Maya Angelou
{94685}{94749}But Scott rejected me,|c'est la vie
{94750}{94812}Life is cruel,|treats you unfairly
{94813}{94879}Even so, a God there must be
{94880}{94930}Mini-Me,you complete me
{94931}{94992}Justthe two of us
{94992}{95056}We can make it if we try
{95058}{95133}Justthe two of us
{95134}{95180}Justthe two of us
{95181}{95257}Justthe two of us
{95258}{95313}Building castles in the sky
{95314}{95369}Justthe two of us
{95370}{95412}You and l
{95702}{95771}You've gotthis packed|really tight.
{95772}{95824}Are you OK?
{95825}{95889}Yeah, l just got a bit|of a back cramp,that's all.
{95920}{95969}Just keep packing it in.
{95970}{96013}God.
{96014}{96052}lfound the explosives.
{96054}{96086}Help me checkthem.
{96087}{96135}You're surrounded!|Dropyourweapons!
{96152}{96186}Hands up!
{96222}{96254}Move out!
{96347}{96408}Ladies and gentlemen,|in just afew moments...
{96409}{96493}we're going to place|a giant ''laser'' on the moon.
{96494}{96537}From my ''Death Star...''
{96538}{96622}l will destroy|every city on the planet.
{96622}{96655}Get off of me.
{96656}{96753}Ah, Mr. Powers, Ms. Shagwell...
{96754}{96818}welcome to my|hollowed-outvolcano.
{96819}{96878}This is my associate|Fat Bastard.
{96879}{97034}Felicity, l thinkyou two|may have already ''met.''
{97035}{97070}Unfortunately.
{97071}{97170}ls that all the thanks l get|forthe night of hot sex?
{97171}{97246}l'm dead sexy.
{97246}{97295}You were crap!
{97349}{97400}ln your dreams.
{97523}{97606}Felicity would never|sleepwith you.
{97607}{97657}Right?
{97658}{97704}l did what l had to do.
{97705}{97750}l'm a secret agent.
{97751}{97795}What?
{97955}{98017}All right,that's enough,|Fat Bastard.
{98018}{98079}As much as l like|seeing Powers in agony--
{98080}{98116}and l do--
{98116}{98191}the thought of you naked|is just gross.
{98192}{98265}You can't stop me now,|Mr. Powers.
{98266}{98322}l have your mojo...
{98322}{98392}and l'm taking itwith me|to the moon.
{98393}{98442}Putthem in a jail cell.
{98474}{98576}My mojo! l'll getyou, Dr. Evil!
{98577}{98646}Look at me, l'm shaking|in my little space boots.
{98647}{98696}l want my mojo!
{98697}{98748}Great plan, Einstein.
{98784}{98842}You're gonna put him in a cell|with one inept guard...
{98843}{98871}and they'll escape!
{98872}{98940}God,you do this every time!
{98941}{99034}You know, Scott...
{99035}{99174}l've been africkin' evil doctor|forthirtyfrickin' years, OK?
{99175}{99248}Cut me somefrickin' slack.
{99249}{99353}Youforget, Scott,|we're in a volcano.
{99354}{99451}We're surrounded|by liquid hot magma.
{99491}{99534}What are you drawing?
{99580}{99641}lt's just a good-bye card,|that's all.
{99685}{99725}lt's sweet.
{99926}{99969}Hey, get him. Getthe baby!
{99970}{99998}Back off.
{99999}{100036}Simmer down. Simmer down.
{100086}{100135}He's my posse.
{100175}{100234}You take special care of him.
{100235}{100290}He's my special boy.
{100291}{100365}Attention, preparefor launch.
{100404}{100515}Repeat, all technicians|to launch position.
{100537}{100644}Gentlemen,|l'm aboutto go to the moon.
{100645}{100735}lnitiate prelaunch sequence.
{100736}{100804}Main rocket engines, ignition.
{100805}{100833}Frau...
{100834}{100884}begin the countdown.
{100885}{100933}Five...four...
{100933}{100962}three...two--
{100963}{101032}Frau!|Begin the countdown atthirty.
{101078}{101103}Thirty!
{101104}{101169}twenty-nine...twenty-eight...
{101170}{101217}twenty-seven...
{101218}{101275}twenty-six...twenty-five...
{101276}{101368}twenty-four...twenty-three...
{101369}{101446}twenty-two...twenty-one...
{101447}{101506}twenty...nineteen...
{101506}{101545}eighteen....
{101547}{101646}seventeen...sixteen...
{101647}{101717}fifteen...fourteen...thirteen--
{101718}{101785}You know what?|When the doors close...
{101786}{101849}just say ''go.'' Better.
{101964}{101990}Go!
{102753}{102808}Colonel,you better|take a look atthis radar.
{102809}{102877}What is it, son?
{102878}{102928}l don't know, sir.
{102930}{102959}But it looks like|a giant--
{102960}{103002}-Dick!|-Yeah?
{103003}{103035}Take a look out of starboard.
{103036}{103120}Oh, my God,|it looks like a huge--
{103121}{103170}-Pecker!|-Oh,where?
{103171}{103213}Wait,that's not a woodpecker.
{103214}{103239}lt looks like someone's--
{103240}{103269}Privates!
{103270}{103339}We have reports of|an unidentifiedflying object.
{103340}{103440}lt is a long, smooth shaft,|complete with--
{103441}{103514}Two balls! What is that?
{103515}{103557}That looks just|like an enormous--
{103558}{103594}Wang! Pay attention.
{103595}{103673}l was distracted by|that enormousflying--
{103674}{103710}-Willie...|-Yeah?
{103711}{103752}What's that?
{103753}{103808}Well, it looks|like a giant--
{103809}{103847}-Johnson?!|-Yes, sir.
{103848}{103930}Call British lntelligence|and letthem know aboutthis.
{104338}{104367}What do we do?
{104368}{104449}Why don'tyou just shag|Fat Bastard again?
{104450}{104500}This is no time to getjealous.
{104501}{104544}How could you do it?
{104545}{104575}l was just doing my job.
{104576}{104629}No, l mean literally,|how could you do it?
{104630}{104662}The man's sofat...
{104663}{104712}the sheer mechanics of it|are mind-boggling.
{104713}{104807}Don't lay your hang-ups on me,|just 'cause you lostyour mojo.
{104808}{104870}Ouch, baby.
{104871}{104932}Very ouch.
{104932}{104992}Look,Austin,|we're running out of time.
{104992}{105032}l'm sorry.
{105068}{105143}l just did what l thoughtyou|would do in the same situation.
{105174}{105230}You're the reason|that l became a spy.
{105265}{105378}l thought l wanted to be you,|butthen l realized that...
{105405}{105461}l wantto be with you.
{105462}{105509}You do?
{105561}{105603}Hang on, baby.
{105604}{105651}Alleyoop!
{105681}{105731}We should talk aboutthis later.
{105732}{105778}Firstwe need to get past|that one inept guard.
{105779}{105814}Right, here's the plan.
{105815}{105883}What if l pretend to be ill|withfood poisoning?
{105884}{105963}The guard, drawn by my cries|of pain, comes to investigate.
{105964}{106006}Meanwhile,you dig a pit...
{106007}{106049}line itwith makeshift|punji sticks...
{106050}{106086}madefrom sharpened|toothbrushes.
{106087}{106149}The guardfalls in,|Bob's your uncle,we escape.
{106150}{106179}What do you think?
{106180}{106230}That mightwork,|butwhat aboutthis?
{106280}{106324}What do you think of these?
{106325}{106368}Mommy.
{106522}{106577}What a...burn?
{106642}{106741}That sort of thing|could get a man...fired.
{106788}{106823}l think he was...
{106824}{106913}hot...for...you.
{106914}{106963}-That's enough.|-Yeah.
{107119}{107226}Ladies and gentlemen,|welcome to my moon base.
{107227}{107355}You've all been chosen to be|part of my elite moon unit.
{107356}{107416}Which is divided into|two divisions...
{107417}{107468}Moon UnitAlpha...
{107469}{107518}and Moon Unit Zappa.
{107519}{107585}ln exactly six hours...
{107586}{107659}the moon will move|in its orbit around the earth...
{107660}{107763}bringing Washington D.C.|within range of my giant...
{107764}{107818}''laser.''
{107819}{107880}Begin ''laser...''
{107881}{107928}ignition sequence.
{107929}{107989}Begin laser ignition!
{108019}{108126}Attention, Moon Unit Zappa|tofiring stations.
{108127}{108190}lnitiation sequence in progress.
{108191}{108244}OK, all right.
{108331}{108427}All l askedforwas africkin'|rotating chair, OK?
{108518}{108564}Getting a little afraid.
{108565}{108648}l need an old priest|and a young priest.
{108649}{108715}The power of Christ compels you.
{108716}{108800}The power of Christ compels you.
{108881}{108981}Sick as a dog now.
{109067}{109109}Gonna vomit.
{109303}{109396}We need to hitch a ride|to the moon, baby.
{109397}{109467}Apollo Eleven is good to go.
{109468}{109509}Crew to all stations.
{109548}{109648}We will have liftoff|in T minusfive seconds...
{109649}{109717}four...three...two.
{109756}{109797}We have liftoff.
{109798}{109840}Apollo Eleven|has cleared the tower...
{109841}{109905}and is heading|for a rendezvous with the moon.
{110128}{110214}Arm the ''laser.''
{110214}{110260}Arming the laser!
{110261}{110334}Attention,|arming the Death Star.
{110334}{110363}Battle stations.
{110364}{110401}Laser on!
{110402}{110479}All crew at battle stations.
{110480}{110533}Get me the president.
{110534}{110603}You're gonna like this part,|Mini-Me.
{110604}{110679}This is the partwhere|we threaten the world leader.
{110680}{110751}l know we do it every time,|however it is importantto--
{110947}{110983}Where are you?
{110984}{111061}Can someone put africkin' bell|on him or something?
{111122}{111154}Great!
{111155}{111212}Somebody getthe stick.
{111244}{111314}Just grab on to the hook,|all right?
{111315}{111354}You complete me.
{111355}{111397}l love you.
{111422}{111475}Hang in there, Mini-Me.
{111476}{111523}If anything|should happen to you...
{111524}{111574}l don't know what l would do.
{111575}{111647}l'd probably move on,|get another replica.
{111647}{111696}Butthere'd be|a ten-minute period there...
{111697}{111767}when l would just be|inconsolable.
{111768}{111831}We have your money, Dr. Evil,|but itwasn't easy.
{111832}{111894}Papa has to do some work, OK?
{111895}{111977}Well,you have exactly|thirty minutes to get itto me.
{111978}{112016}Ciao.
{112081}{112114}Jiminy jumpin' Jesus,
{112115}{112178}l can't believe|we're gonna pay that madman.
{112179}{112230}l got nukes upthe ying-yang.
{112231}{112307}Just let me launch one,|for God's sake.
{112308}{112378}Are you suggesting|thatwe blow upthe moon?
{112379}{112440}Would you miss it?
{112441}{112473}Would you miss it?
{112569}{112672}Mission control,|the swinger has landed.
{112699}{112762}Airlock, open.
{112881}{112910}Repressurize.
{112911}{112950}Let'sfind Dr. Evil.
{112951}{113010}Enjoy your stay on the moon.
{113099}{113143}There he is.
{113201}{113233}l'll coveryour rear.
{113234}{113289}No,you go ahead.
{113290}{113359}This time it's personal.
{114989}{115062}No more.|l can'ttake it anymore.
{115087}{115148}Peace?
{115149}{115202}You brought my glasses.
{115204}{115255}Bless your little heart.
{115283}{115320}Well,that's not right.
{115360}{115423}Don't--That's just--|Now l'm pissed.
{115465}{115494}Judoflip!
{115691}{115759}Poor little bugger.
{115760}{115803}He's so small.
{115804}{115858}He's like a dog or something.
{115884}{115930}Poor little bugger.
{116098}{116148}Get off!
{116590}{116625}Get out of my suit!
{116657}{116717}lttickles. lttickles.
{116844}{116873}Gotcha!
{117568}{117606}Poor little bugger.
{117608}{117670}l salute you.
{117914}{117949}All right, slap-head.
{117950}{117993}Turn around.
{117994}{118065}Where's my mojo?
{118066}{118140}Well, it looks like you|have a choice, Mr. Powers--
{118141}{118192}save the world...
{118193}{118251}or save your girIfriend.
{118308}{118370}Don'tworry about me,Austin.
{118371}{118411}You've gotto save the world.
{118443}{118468}Kill him!
{118547}{118579}Fire the ''laser.''
{118580}{118609}Target locking.
{118634}{118663}God!
{118664}{118733}Laser settofull vitality.
{118745}{118774}Judo kick!
{118916}{118988}You may have won the battle,|Mr. Powers...
{118989}{119025}butyou lostthe war.
{119106}{119188}Wake up, Felicity. Wake up!
{119189}{119230}Escape pod ninety-five.
{119333}{119375}l love you, Felicity.
{119376}{119415}l love you.
{119416}{119497}Dr. Evil! l'll kill him!
{119614}{119638}Gotcha!
{119824}{119892}You shot me,you a-hole.
{119918}{119999}And now l'm going to kill you.
{120026}{120066}Before you do that...
{120122}{120164}know this...
{120377}{120430}l am yourfather.
{120487}{120521}Really?
{120569}{120606}No, not really.
{120606}{120644}l can't backthat up.
{120645}{120725}Right. ldiot. Yes.
{120726}{120795}But isn't it interesting,|Mr. Powers...
{120796}{120857}thatyou would rather kill me...
{120857}{120917}than save|your precious Felicity?
{120918}{120971}What do you mean?
{120972}{121084}Remember,there's a time portal|in the main chamber.
{121085}{121159}You could go back and save her.
{121159}{121200}l'll do that.
{121582}{121611}Good work!
{122014}{122080}Well, it looks like you|have a choice, Mr. Powers--
{122081}{122176}save the world|or save your girIfriend.
{122227}{122276}Don'tworry about me,Austin.
{122276}{122307}You gotta save the world.
{122352}{122410}l choose love, baby.
{122411}{122476}Wait a tick. Who are you?
{122477}{122537}l'm you,ten minutesfrom now.
{122538}{122606}Damn it! You are handsome.
{122633}{122672}l was justthinking the same.
{122715}{122772}We are sexy.
{122773}{122846}We are sexy bitches. Yeah!
{122847}{122918}All right.|This is ri-goddamn-diculous.
{122919}{122952}Kill them both!
{123122}{123162}Fire the ''laser.''
{123163}{123211}Listen, pastAustin...
{123212}{123268}can you save the world|while l go getthe girl?
{123269}{123332}Sure,Austin-from-|ten-minutes-from-now.
{123333}{123389}Lock in target.
{123390}{123483}Laser settofull vitality.
{123612}{123690}Come on. Are you all right?|Yeah, come on.
{123718}{123747}You all right?
{123748}{123779}You OK?
{123830}{123914}Say,what's the policy|on mnage a trois?
{123941}{124006}You are adorable!
{124055}{124132}Lookingforthis, Mr. Powers?
{124133}{124180}My mojo.
{124210}{124283}SeIf-destruct in|two minutes and counting.
{124550}{124579}Watch out!
{124836}{124886}See you in hell, Powers.
{125002}{125048}Hey,Austin-from-|ten-minutes-from-now!
{125049}{125133}This place is gonna blow.|Let's go. Come on.
{125268}{125352}Thirty seconds and counting.|Twenty-nine...
{125380}{125429}-Let's go.|-My mojo!
{125430}{125458}We have to go now.
{125459}{125515}My mojo. l'm useless without it.
{125516}{125560}You've had it all along.
{125561}{125590}What do you mean?
{125591}{125650}You defeated Dr. Evil,|you saved the world...
{125651}{125699}and believe me,|you're gonna getthe girl.
{125834}{125859}All rightthen, maybe later.
{125860}{125885}Yeah, come on.
{125965}{125994}Go!
{126031}{126082}l'll setthe controlsfor 1967.
{126104}{126193}Felicity,why don'tyou come|with me to 1999?
{126194}{126251}l don't know.|The Sixties were so groovy.
{126252}{126320}l wantto see what happens|in the Seventies and Eighties.
{126321}{126361}The Seventies and the Eighties?
{126362}{126431}You're not missing anything.|l looked into it.
{126432}{126511}There's a gas shortage|and a Flock of Seagulls.
{126512}{126564}That's about it.
{126618}{126661}Let's go.
{127209}{127255}l love you,Austin Powers.
{127256}{127324}And l love you,|Felicity Shagwell.
{127325}{127381}Whereverwe go...
{127381}{127428}there we are.
{127483}{127544}Special delivery.
{127612}{127667}Surprise, surprise.
{127701}{127809}Listen, missy,|do youfancy another go?
{127810}{127926}'Cause once you've hadfat,|you never go back.
{127927}{127997}You shutyour mouth,|you bastard...
{128036}{128084}who isfat.
{128085}{128113}Yeah,that's very good.
{128114}{128200}Before you kill us,|let me askyou one question.
{128201}{128236}Are you happy?
{128237}{128300}What kind of stupid ass|question is that?
{128302}{128387}l'm rich, and l'm dead sexy.
{128589}{128633}You didn't answer my question.
{128634}{128672}Are you happy?
{128673}{128720}Of course l'm not happy.
{128721}{128792}Look at me, l'm a bigfat slob.
{128793}{128865}l've got biggertitties|than you do.
{128866}{128963}l've got more chins|than a Chinese phone book.
{128964}{129026}l've not seen my willie|in two years...
{129026}{129121}which is long enough|to declare it legally dead.
{129177}{129272}l can't stop eating.
{129273}{129336}l eat because l'm unhappy.
{129417}{129497}l'm unhappy because l eat.
{129498}{129553}lt's a vicious cycle.
{129554}{129616}If you'll excuse me...
{129617}{129704}there's someone l have to get|in touch with andforgive.
{129734}{129778}MyseIf.
{129888}{129941}Oh, God.
{129942}{130019}Sorry, lfarted.
{130063}{130102}lt's a long road ahead.
{130171}{130218}Who am l kidding?
{130218}{130252}l'm going to kill you anyway.
{130253}{130288}Judo chop!
{130337}{130429}Right in the mommy-daddy button!
{130430}{130494}That'sfor calling me crap,|youfatty.
{130749}{130816}Listen, baby, l don't care|if he is a Fat Bastard...
{130817}{130878}you don't give a man|a shot in the pills.
{130879}{130922}lt's just not cricket.
{130923}{131000}Do you think l'll be happy|here in the Nineties?
{131001}{131072}Well, l know the Nineties|might sound boring...
{131073}{131139}but asfar as l'm concerned...
{131140}{131260}l've broughtthe best part|of the Sixties backwith me.
{131261}{131293}You.
{131294}{131336}Wait a minute.
{131337}{131374}Where are you going?
{132538}{132580}Did we get Dr. Evil?
{132581}{132654}No. He got away in that rocket|that looks like a huge...
{132655}{132682}Penis.
{132683}{132755}The male reproductive organ.
{132756}{132832}Also known as tallywhacker,|schlong, or...
{132833}{132864}Wiener?
{132865}{132918}Any of you kids|want anotherwiener?
{132919}{132977}Dad,what's that?
{132978}{133047}l don't know, son,|but it's got great big...
{133048}{133112}Nuts! Hot, salty nuts!
{133113}{133180}Who wants some?|Lord almighty!
{133181}{133224}That looks just like|my husband's...
{133225}{133272}One-eyed monster.
{133273}{133339}Step right up and see|the one-eyed monster!
{133390}{133427}Hey,what's that?
{133428}{133471}lt looks like a big...
{133472}{133528}Woody! Woody Harrelson?
{133529}{133571}Can l have your autograph?
{133572}{133603}Sure, no problem.
{133604}{133677}Oh, my Lord. Look atthatthing.
{133678}{133708}lt's so big.
{133709}{133755}l've seen bigger. That's...
{133756}{133805}Just a little prick.
{133805}{133852}lt's aflu shot.
{133853}{133905}You've been|in the coldness of space.
{133906}{133958}l don'twantyou to get sick.
{133959}{134013}lt's one thing to attack me.
{134014}{134079}lt's quite another|to attack my Mini-Me.
{134080}{134155}l'm gonna getyou,|Austin Powers.
{134156}{134206}l'm gonna getyou.
{134660}{134735}Thankyou. Welcome back.|Today we're doing afollow-up...
{134736}{134778}to a segment|we did several months ago...
{134779}{134844}on ''Fathers who are trying|to take overthe world.''
{134845}{134909}Let's begin with Scott Evil.
{134988}{135041}What's going on with your dad?
{135042}{135078}Well, my dad tried to take|overthe world...
{135079}{135131}with a giant laser on the moon.
{135157}{135189}l know.
{135190}{135242}We have a surpriseforyou.
{135243}{135273}What, my dad?
{135274}{135335}No, it's notyourfather.|lt's your mother.
{135336}{135365}Come on out.
{135541}{135579}Mom?
{135580}{135699}Scott,you are my love child|with Dr. Evil.
{135700}{135759}l thought|l was a test-tube baby.
{135760}{135819}Lies. All lies!
{135868}{135905}l love you, Mom.
{135938}{135991}l love you,too, son.
{136126}{136164}Thankyou.
{136165}{136240}You know,|what have we learned here today?
{136241}{136334}Perhaps it's that|no one can take your mojo.
{136335}{136392}You can look around|all you want...
{136393}{136482}butwhatyou're really trying|tofind is on the inside.
{136483}{136554}Take care of yourseIf|and each other.
{136709}{136786}l think l'm gonna like it|in the Nineties.
{136787}{136854}l never knew|it could be this way!
{136855}{136900}Oh, baby, baby, baby.
{137018}{137053}That's good.
{137174}{137204}How could you?
{137205}{137247}l thoughtthat--
{137248}{137311}PastAustin?
{137312}{137397}Technically,|it's not cheating, baby.
{137398}{137473}Felicity, l can't blame you.
{137474}{137546}The man is handsome, baby!
{137547}{137602}We're just plain handsome, man.
{137603}{137688}Am l wrong,|butthis makes me horny, baby.
{137689}{137723}Very randy!
{137752}{137801}Well, one thing'sfor sure--
{137802}{137866}l've got my mojo back.
{137922}{137963}lt's definitely back.
{137964}{138008}Hello. You all right?
{138009}{138090}Me spuds are boiling.
{138163}{138224}Come on, darling,|let's hop on the goodfoot...
{138225}{138262}and do the bad thing.
{138263}{138312}Paging Dr. Freud.
{141867}{141918}Hello upthere.
{141919}{141963}ls the movie over?
{141964}{142001}l'm still down here...
{142002}{142050}and l'm still in|quite a lot of pain.
{142051}{142117}Maybe someone in the lobby|could call an ambulance.
{142118}{142180}Oh,the pain|is really quite severe.
{142180}{142245}l'vefashioned|a makeshift splint.
{142246}{142282}Here goes nothing.
